Meg and Joe Speak!

Closing Shop

2010-05-20T23:18:00.002-05:00

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. I am closing this one and starting a new one. There have been a lot of changes in my life, and I feel the need to start fresh. You can read more over at http://little-pudding-pie.blogspot.com/.

I'm tired...

2010-01-22T18:39:00.003-06:00

I hate Fridays. And.... I love Fridays. Of course, Friday signals that start of the weekend where I know I'm going to get some sort of rest, but Friday also means coming home (which is good) and realizing I'm going to have to leave again in a short amount of time (the bad part).

I got home today around 4:30, unpacked my stuff, and laid on the bed while Joe was cooking dinner. And then it hit me - in 48 hours I'll be walking out the door again. When I signed up for med school, I knew it would be hard, but I had no idea the hardest part would be the emotional taxation. Being apart from my home and Joe every week takes away part of me that, I think, would allow me to relax a little more. Medical school is stressful alone, and add being away from your spouse all week and the stress compounds. Not to mention working full-time, and I often feel like I'm going crazy.

I find myself counting the days until my last exam of M1....

And make it my mantra that I only have ___ more days left.

For you pre-meds out there that stumble upon my blog, medical school is hard. There's stress, anxiety, the feeling of helplessness, being overwhelmed, like it will never end. Eventually, it does, but when you do the happy dance of excitement that you got in, remember that on the first day of class, your life dies. You no longer have free time for your friends and family. You get the signs and symptoms of sleep deprivation. You learn to appreciate coffee, black, and strong. You look forward to federal and university holidays and weekends, not for rest or relaxation, but because you have extra time to cram all the material into your head.

"They" say it gets better, that first year (and second year somewhat) are the worst for academic-induced sleep/life-deprivation. Having had a clinical rehab career for 10 years, and watching my mother go through med school, I know this to be true. I know it gets better, and that any night on call in any rotation beats cramming for exam after exam as an M1. However, I'm stuck as an M1 right now and really wanting it to end. I want to live in one house. I want to wake up every morning next to my husband. I want to come home every evening to my husband and my house. I'm tired of a futon as a makeshift bed. I'm tired of spending more time with roommates than my husband. I'm tired of trying to juggle work, school, and study. I'm tired, tired, tired!

A new semester...

2010-01-16T12:26:00.002-06:00

The Spring 2010 semester is here. My agenda is as follows:

Biochemistry
Neuroscience
Physiology
Behavioral Science

Now, I'm quite stoked about the first three courses. The latter, however, as a conservative, deeply disappoints me from the start. Our semester has begun with a review of health care policy, aka "why you students should just accept the government health care plan". Our lectures are by a man who holds a Ph.D., but, with a straight face spouts off the liberal talking points that have been debunked time and time again.

46 million Americans uninsured? No......

The U.S. has one of the highest infant mortality rates in the developed world. Not necessarily...

The uninsured can't afford to buy health insurance. Not according to this book...

Mercifully, these were the overt themes of the lecture, assumingly because we only had a 50-minute time frame for lecture, with some minor topics including the lecturer praising HMOs as the best way of controlling costs.

There were a few comments the lecturer made that I agree with, including the idea that if patients and physicians want more autonomy in their care, then costs will be higher than if the gov't decides on care and rationing of care. The rest of the semester that deals with health care policy will also touch on ethical topics such as sanctity of life, autonomy, health care rationing, alleged "access", and many more.

Fortunately, much of the semester is an introduction to psychiatry for 2nd year, so the health care policy lectures will be sporadic. What really irritates me the most is the idea that I'm taking out student loans at $50,000 a year to have professors use their political persuasion to lecture me. This lecture was not objective, there were no alternative views addressed, the statistics and studies that use them were false (have been debunked), and the lecturer made vague derogatory references to the political persuasion I belong to. I am not a Republican, or "big R" Republican, but a republican - "little r" republican (credit to Mike Church for the "little r" term). A hybrid of libertarian, constitutional, and republican conservative ideals. Conservative being key.

I took the opportunity to email a widely known physician activist against gov't-run health care for advice on how to handle this course. Given the nature of my home institution and the air of liberalism in the instructor, the best advice I was given was to keep my head down, regurgitate for the exam, and keep my conservative ideals in check for my future practice. And unfortunately, that's what I'm going to do. I highly doubt my university, the same university that employs Bill Ayers, btw, will actually concede to giving equal time to conservative options for healthcare in this case. In the end, though, I will have no excuse not to be armed with knowledge of the ideas the left wants to implement, and how I can do my best to implement my "little r" republicanism in the face of this.

I'm sure I will comment more on this course as the semester moves on. The rest of my courses though are great. I do enjoy my professors and appreciate that they give us a strict scientific education without much bias. Of course, there's always some element of bias in one's own field, but they do well to keep it to a minimum. No political themes, (save one immunology professor last year), no ethical or moral quandries to worry about. The material alone is hard enough without having to to bring emotion into play! Even our genetics professor was fairly balanced when discussing stem cells and other controversial medical issues.

Being a conservative, and a Christian one at that, I still feel it's important to be armed with all the information present in medicine today. I need to learn what embryonic stem cells are, and what they're used for. I just don't want my professors making qualitative statements about these topics based on their personal opinions. Just give me the facts and let me decide. Yes, abortions exist, and I want to know what the procedure is in an anatomical, physiological, and surgical sense. Some states allow physician-assisted suicide now. I want to know how it's performed in a biochemical and physiological sense. Do NOT tell me it's my "duty" to perform them though, just because you approve of them.

And so far, with exception to my new Behavioral Sciences course, it's been fairly benign. Now, for topics!

Biochem started the semester off with a lecture on blood clotting and thrombosis. Our current lecturer is incredibly thorough, too.

Physiology started out with the GI system. So I guess I'm learning how to deal with other people's shit right now (<--- comic relief portion of the post). Seriously, though, the GI system is considered one of the nasty, undesirable topics, but there's a lot of interesting things happening with our nervous systems and hormones that allow our bodies to keep on going.

Neuroscience seems to strike fear into the hearts of my classmates, but I think this will be the sleeper course that I come to love. Anatomy was also that way for me. Neuro is starting smoothly, mostly because my original career and degrees required a significant amount of knowledge of neuroanatomy and neurophysiology. Learning lower extremity sensory and motor movements will be challenging, but I'm hoping the rest will be a more in-depth review. I'm really looking forward to the lab - I really enjoyed my neuroscience lab when working on a doctorate degree years ago (of which I left to study medicine).

Outside of school, January's sailing on and we're halfway done with the month already. I kind of want time to fly until May. We have lots on our plate for the first half of this year! We're wanting to put our house on the market as soon as we finish the last 2 bedrooms and a few more small repairs. A new roof will go on when the snow melts (March????). I also need to get our taxes sent off before March 1, so I can meet the priority date for FAFSA filing. Since our government has decided to work towards bankruptcy I need to get a head start on loan qualifications.

So, this Spring of 2010 will be as busy as ever...

Quotes from Fern's Bible....

2010-01-04T21:13:00.002-06:00

I found a program to the funeral of an old Mennonite woman I cared for when working in Arthur. The following are quotes taken from her Bible:

"Quotes from Fern's Bible"

There is no limit to what a man can do or where he can go if he doesn't mind who gets the credit.
Worship is gathering to praise God, listening for Him to speak; through music, scripture or prayer; God may speak through a person or what we read. If we listen carefully, we will hear God.
There will be more power in the pulpit when there is more praise from the pew.
If the going is really easy - beware! You may be going downhill.
Do you believe the Bible? We believe that part of the Bible that we put into practice.
True wisdom starts with a heart full of truth, not a head full of facts.
Nothing lies beyond the reach of prayer except that which lies outside the will of God.
Heaven's delights will far outweigh earth's difficulties.
Fear God and you'll have nothing else to fear.
There are none so good that they can save themselves, none so bad that God cannot save them.
The man who continues pulling on the oars doesn't have much time to rock the boat.
You don't need to know where you are going provided you know who you are following.
The church must preach or perish, teach or tarnish, evangelize or fossilize.
Conversation to Christ makes useful saints out of useless sinners.
A well-read Bible means a well-fed soul.
We are saved by God's mercy, not by our merit; by Christ's dying, not our doing.
The church is like a bank - what you put into it causes your interest to grow.
God often uses unique methods to perform mighty miracles.
A small step of obedience is a giant step to blessing.
Don't let yesterday's failures bankrupt tomorrow's efforts.
You cannot repent too soon because you do not know how soon it will be too late.
Sometimes we are so busy adding up troubles that we don't have time to count our blessings.
It is good to follow the pastor when the pastor follows the Master.
Plan as if Christ's return were years away, but be ready as if it were today.
When criticizing don't forget God is listening.

I've wanted to put these in print for a while now. I never knew this woman when she was full of life. I only knew her as her mind left her, an island to herself in a sea of men. The quotes she left behind tell me her faith was great. She lived to be 91 years old, and the purpose of her life lives on.

End of the Year Update...

2009-12-20T13:32:00.002-06:00

Seems like I'm only getting to this blog quarterly. It's been a busy year! Finished final exams last week and managed to pass all my classes! I had a grade high enough for honors in Genetics going into the final exam, but my Respiratory Physiology exam was the same day, and I just didn't have the time to study for both, given my exam schedule. So, I ended up only glancing at the Genetics material to get through Physiology. I ended up not doing very well on both exams, but had I not done that, I would have failed Physiology, so it worked out ok. I just didn't get my honors. Overall, I think I'm somewhere in the middle of my class, or at least that's where I've been on the exam histograms (except for my Genetics and Physio finals). And that's just fine with me right now.

Now that exams have ended we're gearing up for Christmas. This year we are spending it with the Hedlunds since we were with the Carrs last year. With some time off in between classes we are also going to clean out our basement (we've accumulated so much STUFF) and put a plan together for redo-ing the master and guest bedroom and master bath. We would like to sell our house soon because come 2nd year of medical school, I won't be able to work and money could be tight for making the mortgage and bills work. Once the snow clears we also need a new roof, and that should be the last of the necessary improvements to sell the house.

The snow season has started - we currently have a couple inches on the ground, and Joe is really getting a kick out of his new truck and the 4 wheel drive. Something tells me it's going to be a really white Christmas this year!

Not much else to say right now... I'm undergoing decompression after such a stressful 4 months. Perhaps after Christmas or the New Year I will write more.

Merry Christmas!

Birthday week....

2009-08-11T14:26:00.002-05:00

Joe turned 40 this past weekend!!! Woo! Had a nice party here for him with family and friends and a LOT of food and HOT weather. It was exhausting, though. I will post pictures when I get them loaded.

Last Wednesday I decided to quit my job. The company I worked for just crossed a few lines and I'd had it. I was working in several nursing homes, but at one in particular the nursing staff just couldn't get it together. Therapy orders would sit for weeks before being called in to the doctor and implemented and people I would refer for swallowing tests at the hospital were not able to get them done because of the lax in calling in orders. Communication around the home was ridiculous - I would make a diet change and nursing would get pissed if I directly told dietary. The Director of Nursing was worthless, IMO. She was afraid of confrontation, and when I came to her with my issues, she was upset because I was "mean" and "yelling" at her. WTF? It's mean and yelling when I ask you to do your job?

I took my concerns to my regional director, who came in and met with the DON, and then did.... nothing. Didn't have my back for the behavior of the nursing staff toward therapy and the obvious JCAHO violations in letting orders sit for so long. IMO, the guy had no spine and just wanted to keep the peace. Unfortunately, when a nursing staff crosses the line to involve patient care, you can't just "keep the peace". So that irritated me this past month. THEN, looking at my pay stub for the 7/1-7/15 pay period, I noticed I was missing about an hour and a half of travel time. Looking at my copy of my original travel log and my paycheck, I knew something wasn't right. I called the company's billing department and found out my regional manager, the same spinless guy from before, had made changes to my travel log without my permission or even talking to me. Talk about fraud!!!! I called his supervisor and she said she'd look into it. This was last Monday, and I still haven't heard back from her.

So last Wednesday, I stopped at the post office before heading to work because my company sent my nametag and the post office was holding it. I went to pick it up, and I had to pay for the postage. Seriously. My company couldn't even send me a nametag without taking money from me. At that point, I'd had enough. I'm a PRN employee and I didn't need to give a notice at all. So I walked into work on Wednesday and told them that would be my last day. The End.

My regional manager kept calling me, leaving messages about being concerned that I quit, that he had no idea I was going to quit, and how would he find coverage? I never called him back. I felt no obligation. I let my facility rehab directors know and tied up loose ends with nursing staffs for those patients I had on therapy and finished out my day. There was no reason to call the regional director, especially since he was the one who took pay from me and it still hadn't been resolved. Not my problem anymore.

So, this week I'm on "vacation" at home in Sandwich and working on the office. So far, the walls are spackled, the trim is down, and the next step is to paint (tomorrow). After that, we can put flooring down and new trim up. It's coming along!

July 2009

2009-07-24T18:34:00.003-05:00

Life seems to happen in spurts! There are days I have tons of time, then I go months in 5th gear without taking a breath!

School starts up again in 3 weeks - 3 WEEKS!!!!!!!!! I'm finishing phase 2 of my first year of med school and I'm so ready to get going! I know my time will be that much more limited and I will be that much more stressed, but I will also be that much more close to moving back HOME.

The first year of med school was definitely a challenge and a journey. After deciding to split my first year in two (hooray free time!), I also battled an abscessed molar from a shoddy dentist, my husband getting laid off for 9 weeks, and my father having cardiac issues and stents/pacemaker placed. I also took a part-time (that turned into full-time) job as a speech therapist in a group of nursing homes. And now I'm ready to finish out my M1 year.

This year's courses include Biochemistry, Embryology, Genetics, Physiology, Behavioral Science, and Neuroscience. Only 1 lab - Neuroscience (spring).

Outside of work and school, this summer we've been able to get the yard landscaped, the deck stained and we're currently in the middle of remodeling the office/3rd bedroom. We've got a few more things to do: paint trim on the house and garage, plant a few plants, and give the inside a good cleaning. That leaves the other 2 bedrooms and the basement to sift through for Fall/Winter/Spring projects.

Current events have been quite stressful, from happenings in my own circle of friends to what's happening with our country. It's no secret that I loathe our current administration and it's really frustrating to want to go into a specialty that our president continues to demonize and has no provisions to protect. It's also a bit frustrating to live with people (at school) who adore what I think is vile and try to keep a happy face. I don't begrudge anyone their opinion (we are still a free country for the time being), but I don't have to be happy about it. I am relieved that we find middle ground in some of the basic joys in life, like shopping, food, some TV, and the neighborhood kids. And reluctantly, I admit I am thankful for exposure to another POV I otherwise wouldn't experience.

As far as current events more close to home, one of my best friends is going through a divorce and it's been hard, no bones about it. Joe and I always thought they were the "perfect" couple - you know how it goes. But things are not always as they seem and I respect that. My friend initiated the divorce and I feel awful that she's now treated as a pariah amongst those closest to her. I don't know why society feels that someone who initiates a divorce automatically gives up all rights to all things in a marriage. Sometimes they just don't work and it takes real balls to own up to it. It pains me to see her hurt and it's even more hard that I'm at an extremely busy part in my life and can't be with her more to help her. I just don't feel like my "spirit" is enough and am beginning to feel like a jerk of a friend :( But I'm trying as best I can.

Lastly, I've also been somewhat successful in working on getting my body in a healthy state. I've lost about 2 inches at each measurement point and I'm guessing 15-20 pounds (?) since the start of summer. I didn't really get serious about things until about after Memorial Day, but I've gotten in an eating plan routine and I'm working on my exercise routine. I've also been training myself to be an early riser so I can work out before classes this year, or at least try. I still have what seems a long way to go, but at least I'm getting results! The next thing I *really* need to work on is my weekend food intake. I'm excellent during the week, but the weekend slows me down. It's hard living in 2 cities and coming/going between 2 homes. But, as I've said with the rest of the stuff, I can do it.

All right, done with the update. Hope to post a little more consistently soon!

The Second French Revolution

2009-04-13T09:17:00.001-05:00

This young man from Harvard is quite wise...

The Second French Revolution

Every old ideological conflict eventually becomes new again. So it is with today's battle between the forces of socialism, called “fairness” by its advocates, and the forces of capitalism, labeled “liberty” by its supporters. What we are witnessing is an ancient struggle between those who believe in the rights of the individual and those who believe in a sort of “general will.” Those of conservative bent ardently hope for a second American Revolution; those of the left wish desperately for a second French Revolution.

This is not mere rhetoric. Look at the history of the first American Revolution, and you will see the fundamental principles that animate Rush Limbaugh; look at the history of the first French Revolution, and you will see the spirit that animates President Barack Obama.

John Adams' Declaration of the Rights of the Inhabitants of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, ratified in 1780, provides the basic framework for American governing philosophy: “All men are born free and equal, and have certain natural, essential, and unalienable rights; among which may be reckoned the right of enjoying and defending their lives and liberties; that of acquiring, possessing, and protecting property; in fine, that of seeking and obtaining their safety and happiness.” The purpose of the government is to secure these rights.

By contrast, France's 1789 Declaration of the Rights of Man is an ode to the collective. “The principle of all sovereignty resides essentially in the nation. No body nor individual may exercise any authority which does not proceed directly from the nation,” it states. “Law is the expression of the general will.” The purpose of the government is to make laws benefiting society, not to restrict itself from encroachment upon the rights of the individual.

This philosophical distinction has dramatically different ramifications. The American Revolution was followed by peaceful governance because it granted power — and responsibility — to the individual. It did not excoriate the upper class for its wealth, nor the poorer class for its plight; wealth and poverty were not seen as the result of societal shortcomings. Dramatic social leveling would have been superfluous, in this view.

The French Revolution, by contrast, was bloody and tyrannical. The lead advocate for the rights of man was Robespierre, to whom the individual meant little. He pushed for King Louis XVI's execution on the basis that the collective good required his death; he hunted the nobles with the explanation, “To punish the oppressors of humanity is clemency; to forgive them is cruelty.” This revolution stated that man's equality trumped his liberty.

The same arguments echo through the ages.And so today we have Obama excoriating those on Wall Street with the fervor of a Danton, slandering those in the financial industry as “shameful,” “outrageous,” and “greedy.” It is no wonder AIG executives are relegated to their homes, intimidated by liberal thugs who send death threats reading: “Get the bonus, we will get your children,” “All you mother——ers should be shot,” “We will hunt you down … We will hunt your children and we will hunt your conscience,” “All the executives and their families should be executed with piano wire around their necks.” It is no wonder that in France, 45 percent of the population approve of kidnapping business executives and threatening them to prevent layoffs.

Obama's recent trip to London highlighted the capitulation of American ideals to French ones — only the leading expositors of French Revolution ideals are now British. Not once were individual rights mentioned. But British Prime Minister Gordon Brown and Obama spoke repeatedly of the need for fairness. The current economic crisis, said Brown days before Obama arrived, “should be used as an opportunity to move towards a fairer and more equal world order.”

The constant emphasis on fairness and dearth of discussion about individual liberty bodes ill not only for the pitiable fellows over at AIG (and their children), but for our society more broadly. When America is lathered into tarring-and-feathering mode not because our individual rights have been violated, but because our politicians have told us that “things just aren't fair,” we're entering French Revolution territory.

While the French Revolution was partially justified by monarchy and aristocracy, a Second French Revolution is wholly unjustified: it tears down those who succeed through work rather than by dint of birth. A Second French Revolution replaces a purported aristocracy — the achievers — with a true aristocracy of government administrators.

The American Founding Fathers would have been ashamed and appalled. Most of all, they would have been frightened for the future of our country. The supremacy of the “general will” over individual rights, Adams stated, would bring “horrible ravages.” He was right. He is still right. If we are to have a second revolution, let it be American, not French.

Ben Shapiro, 25, is a graduate of UCLA and Harvard Law School.

Busy Bee...

2009-03-18T12:24:00.002-05:00

Life has been quite comfortable. My husband and I have been living apart as a result of my education, but he'd been working hard and I had been working hard at the classes I'm in and enjoying the reduced schedule that decompression offered.

And then the economy's iron hammer came down on 2/20/09 when my husband was laid off. His company couldn't afford to keep him on staff (as well as 2 others) and they gave him the proverbial "pink slip". So here we are, almost 4 weeks later. The job market has been a joke for him - who knew mechanic positions were that hard to find??? Of about the gajillion places my husband doled his resume out to, a few had openings, but were in the process of being filled. One showed great interest, but was an hour to an hour-fifteen away from home. One way. And didn't pay well enough to afford the drive every day as well as domestic expenses (which are our mortgage and utilities and groceries - no credit card or car mortgage payments!).

The day my husband was laid off - 2/20/09, I started making calls in the Champaign area to go back to work as a speech-language pathologist, and fortunately, I've been able to make enough of a caseload that we can stay afloat - that is, if the State of Illinois pays me in a timely fashion. Of course, that's a gamble with this ill-run state!

In the meantime, my free time has now dwindled back to nil. Boo! But, it's okay for now. It's necessary that I work, and fortunately, playing with 2-year-olds all afternoon and writing a few notes and making a few copies for parents isn't as intellectually challenging as studying for my med school classes (as my schedule was before I decompressed). In fact, I suppose it was blind foresight that I decided to decompress. Who knew that I'd need all this extra time!!!

Anyway, since my husband has been having such terrible luck with finding a job, we have discussed the option of him going back to school, and this may be the option he goes with. Since his formal mechanic education has been by way of a technical degree and on-the-job training, he will have to start from scratch, like a true freshman (sorry honey!). Luckily for him, the general education courses that make up the first 2 years of college education are now offered ONLINE! This is a luxury that I didn't have when I was an undergraduate college student in the mid-90's. So, he can pursue a different career avenue (he's thinking teaching) and be afforded student loans for living purposes, as well as continue to look for a job.

Joe volunteers his MWF afternoons to coach high school rugby, and I'm thankful that he at least has this going on at this time. It's his own personal therapy to be able to get out and teach kids his favorite sport. And, thank goodness the weather is getting warmer. He's also been able to ride his bike a couple of days for some super-therapeutic intervention!

At this point, I think the plan is for Joe to go do his admissions testing at the college (for freshman class placement in english, math, etc.) and then enroll him for summer. It may take 3-4 years for him to complete his degree, but who cares!!!!! Teaching, if that's what he wants, is a pretty solid career choice and more stable economically anyway. Plus, I suppose it's another avenue for coaching as well.

My spirits are a bit higher than they were one month ago, but there is still a long road ahead.

Gibbs-Slap!

2009-02-11T10:57:00.003-06:00

The Media's Top 10 Worst Economic Myths of 2008

2008-12-15T22:24:00.004-06:00

The Media's Top 10 Worst Economic Myths of 2008
BMI's collection of outrageous economic bias for the entire year: From the salmonella outbreak to the media's call for a new, New Deal.

By Julia A. Seymour and Paul Detrick
Business & Media Institute
12/11/2008 3:40:45 PM

Each year the Business & Media Institute looks back on the year's news and selects the top 10 worst economic myths. Here is our 2008 list:

10. Capitalism is dead or dying.

9. Gas at $4-a-gallon, blame the oil companies.

8. Fannie’s failure

7. Barack Obama sends stocks soaring, but not sinking.

6. Alternative energy: All gain, no pain

5. The economy has a fever and the only prescription is more bailouts.

4. Attack of the Killer Tomatoes

3. Oil prices will skyrocket to $200 a barrel, gas to $15.

2. Welcome to 1929: Great Depression II

1. America needs a new, New Deal.

10. Capitalism is dead or dying.

Media myth: From Michael Moore to CNBC, people wondered about the end of free-market capitalism.

free-market capitalism really at death’s door? That’s what the media have claimed, beginning with Pulitzer-prize winning columnist Steven Pearlstein’s obituary for capitalism Aug. 1. Since then, the claim has been repeated in The Washington Post, on CNBC and CNN. Even controversial filmmaker Michael Moore, reacting to the Wall Street bailouts, claimed capitalism was dead on “Larry King Live.”

A front-page analysis in the Oct. 10 Washington Post declared that “The worst financial crisis since the Great Depression is claiming another casualty: American-style capitalism.”

That story by staff writer Anthony Faiola accurately portrayed the potential government takeover of elements of the financial system as un-capitalistic, but incorrectly blamed capitalism for economic devastation.

“[T]he hands-off brand of capitalism in the United States is now being blamed for the easy credit that sickened the housing market and allowed a freewheeling Wall Street to create a pool of toxic investments that has infected the global financial system,” Faiola wrote. His story had no rebuttal from free market economists who say this was not market failure after all. It also claimed that countries have lost respect for the American brand of capitalism in the wake of U.S. financial turmoil.

CNBC also worried Sept. 19 that capitalism “seems to be dead.” That was what former Bloomberg South Europe bureau chief Rob Cox told CNBC’s “The Call” viewers while talking about taxpayer funded bailouts “I don’t know what it means. I don’t know how we’re going to regulate. I don’t know how we’re going to legislate going forward but its dead.”

But not everyone took such a pessimistic tone. Diana Furchtgott-Roth, former chief economist at the U.S. Department of Labor, and current senior fellow at the Hudson Institute said “reports of capitalism’s death are greatly exaggerated,” in an Oct. 16 column.

“Although Washington is using non-market solutions in an attempt to unfreeze the credit markets, they have not succeeded, and are unlikely to be permanent. The next administration, Republican or Democratic, might take over more of the economy,” Furchtgott-Roth said. “But if one country in our global economy proceeds down an unsuccessful socialist road, others will demonstrate the effectiveness of capitalist measures—just as America led the way with tax cuts in the 1980s.”

9. Gas at $4-a-gallon, blame the oil companies.

Media myth: Oil companies and CEOs were a favorite media target in 2008, but the monopolistic oil cartel that does manipulate oil prices was rarely scrutinized.

When gas hit 4 bucks a gallon, who got the blame? Not the oil cartels, that’s for sure.

When oil prices climbed to more than $100 a barrel, journalists were looking for someone to blame for Americans’ “pain at the pump.” They called “Big Oil” companies “thieves” and accused them of reaping “excessive profits” driven by “greed.” But the networks ignored one of the leading causes of high gas prices – the hostile leaders of the world oil cartel – the Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries (OPEC).

On NBC’s May 15 “Today,” host Matt Lauer interviewed ExxonMobil (NYSE:XOM) CEO Rex Tillerson. Lauer quizzed Tillerson on oil companies’ profit margins and higher gas prices, but Lauer didn’t ask Tillerson about other factors that affect the price of gas, like the Lieberman-Warner climate-change bill.

“Most analysts say prices at the pump will get even worse during the summer driving season,” Lauer said, “but the oil companies are posting huge profits.” He noted that ExxonMobil, made a $10.9-billion profit in the first quarter of 2008, and asked Tillerson a question from “Today” viewer “Elaine in Pennsylvania”:

“How can you justify the record profits you’re making when people can’t afford to put gas in their cars to go to work?”

In response, Tillerson pointed out that Exxon’s profits are not large because of high profit margins, but because of high volume. “[W]hen you take our profit of $40 billion [in 2007], that’s 10 cents on every dollar of revenue that we generate,” he said. “That puts us about in the middle of most Fortune 500 companies, so we’re not at the top in terms of profit per revenue; we’re not at the bottom.”

In truth, the law of supply and demand mostly determines the price of a commodity like oil. The rapidly growing economies of China and India demanded ever-increasing amounts of oil, jacking up prices. When demand contracted because of the economic slowdown and high prices the bubble burst and prices collapsed.

But if the media must have villains, it could have looked to someone who actually does manipulate prices: OPEC. Western oil companies must rely on OPEC nations for much of their product. When OPEC meets and decides to curtail oil production, the price of oil to all those companies – and everyone else – goes up.

The Business & Media Institute found that the networks ran 14 times more stories about oil companies’ profits than OPEC profits. Reporters also overlooked the anti-American hostility of some OPEC nations.

8. Fannie’s failure

Media myth: When it came to the demise of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, the network news never saw the trouble coming.

Print journalists had been warning of trouble at government-sponsored enterprises Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac since 2002. But in 2008 ABC, CBS and NBC were clueless when it came to the extreme risk the duo presented to taxpayers.

The NBC “Today” show hinted at problems with the two government-sponsored companies on July 14 when Andrea Mitchell reported Sen. John McCain’s (R-Ariz.) reaction to a bailout:

“John McCain also says the survival of the mortgage giants is essential, despite some of their past practices,” said Mitchell. Viewers were left to wonder what those “past practices” could have been. Here are a few hints: billions of dollars in accounting scandals, stock prices that have plummeted, connections to prominent politicians and a high-risk portfolio.

CNBC’s Erin Burnett shed almost no light on the situation in a “Today” segment the same morning.

When co-host Matt Lauer asked, “How did they get themselves in this situation?” Burnett explained that Fannie and Freddie guarantee mortgages for other lenders so that if the loan goes unpaid, they take the loss instead of the original lender. But she neglected to mention the enterprises’ government mandate to increase home ownership and the implied taxpayer guarantee that enabled the two public companies to dominate the market.

The media also underreported accounting scandals at Fannie Mae. In 2004, earnings restatements at Fannie Mae were $11 billion. That was 19 times bigger than Enron’s, yet Enron is the scandal everyone remembers.

Network reporters should have been reading The Wall Street Journal, which had been sounding alarms about the corruption and financial danger of the lenders’ practices for more than six years. The Journal has run at least 29 editorials or op-eds exposing the two businesses for political connections, preferential regulation, and Enron-like “cooking” of the books.

“The Washington political class has nurtured and subsidized these financial beasts for decades in return for their campaign cash and lobbying support,” said one Journal editorial on July 12. That editorial also pointed out the lack of reporting on the issue saying, “Maybe the press corps will even start reporting how this vast confidence game could happen.”

The Journal wasn’t alone. The Washington Post said on July 14, “Though the implosion of investor confidence in Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac last week was sudden, the worries driving it have been the subject of countless warnings over many years.”

That Post article explained that the two entities had too much debt and not enough capital, operating “with financial cushions that were too thin to support their far-reaching financial risks.” This was something former Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan told lawmakers in 2004, according to the Post. Greenspan argued for “preventive action” “sooner rather than later.”

After Fannie and Freddie failed some in the media blamed free markets, but both Investor’s Business Daily and The Journal explained that it was socialism that created the problem: “We haven’t suddenly become socialists. What taxpayers need to understand is that Fannie and Freddie already practice socialism, albeit of the dishonest kind. Their profit is privatized but their risk is socialized,” said a July 12 Journal editorial.

7. Barack Obama sends stocks soaring, but not sinking.

Media myth: Journalists gave the new president-elect credit for an Election Day stock market rally, but when markets collapsed Obama got a pass.

As stocks rose on Election Day 2008, the media were more than happy to credit investors’ excitement over Democratic nominee Sen. Barack Obama’s chance of winning. But when stocks tanked in the days following Obama’s election, concern over Obama’s economic policies was the last possible culprit.

The Dow fell four trading days out of five following the election, and by the close Nov. 11 was still down more than 600 points from its Nov. 3 close. Stocks were also trading lower on Nov. 12 "after Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson announced changes to the government's bailout plan," according to BusinessWeek.com. The Dow had shed over 3 percent by 11:35 a.m. according to the article.

Yet, one global news agency [which one?] trumpeted the biggest Election Day rally “in history” as an “Obama effect,” while many others declared that investors were simply “relieved” to see the end of the campaign.

But then the markets went into what CNBC’s Melissa Lee termed a “tailspin.” Nov. 5 and 6 losses became the worst two-day decline since the 1987 crash, but the three networks placed no amount of blame on Obama.

Out of 23 stories on ABC, NBC and CBS only one asked about the “notion” that the election outcome could influence the stock market negatively.

Chris Cuomo was the only network reporter to ask about a potential Obama connection to the drop. On Nov. 7 “Good Morning America” he asked ABC News correspondent Bianna Golodryga “What do you make of the notion that the drop in the stock market is a function of the election?”

Golodryga dismissed the idea out of hand. “A lot of people are worried about that, “she said. “The fact that Obama won was something that was really factored into the market, going back a few months ago. Remember the market is a forward looking indicator. Right now, we’re just dealing with these really, really bleak numbers coming out regarding the economy. And there’s also profit-taking as well.”

Forbes.com was one of the only media outlets to analyze the situation differently. Steve Schaefer, Markets Reporter for Forbes was “Looking for the ‘Obama Effect’” in his Nov. 5 article. According to his analysis, the market’s dive was somewhat related to Obama.

“Wall Street tanked Wednesday, as investors fixated on weak economic indicators and pulled the prior session’s gains off the table. The market was also beginning to visualize what a Barack Obama presidency will mean for business, after the Illinois senator won Tuesday’s election,” Schaefer wrote.

But Schaefer cautioned against reading “too much into Wednesday’s trading.” Schaefer’s story admitted that certain types of businesses might be “at risk” under Obama, including tobacco, “Big Oil,” brokers, pharmaceuticals and others.

6. Alternative energy: All gain, no pain

Media myth: According to journalists, the only way out of high gas prices and global warming are expensive, impractical “green” fuels.

Rather than give an even-handed report on the oil supply situation, many journalists continued to push the “green” theme in 2008, calling alternative energies “a surefire way to cut fuel costs” and saying that a fuel other than gasoline would be “a welcome relief,” despite the trillions of dollars and number of years that may take.

In June, CBS “Evening News” stacked a story against drilling on the very night a poll came out showing public support for increased drilling. Correspondent Bill Whitaker cited “bipartisan” opposition to offshore drilling “in California, which suffered a devastating oil spill from a rig off Santa Barbara in 1969.” But he didn’t balance his own story evenly with proponents and opponents; instead he promoted the “green” views of environmentalists and Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger.

NBC “Nightly News” consulted CNBC’s Erin Burnett on June 22. Burnett acknowledged the oil supply problem, saying “a lot of people want oil, and we don’t seem to have enough.” But she never mentioned increasing domestic supply by allowing offshore or ANWR oil exploration.

Instead, Burnett said, “We have to take our lumps, pay these prices and invest aggressively in alternative fuels that we can have right here in the United States of America. We get 15 percent of our power from right now from nuclear energy. We could dramatically increase that. We have other sources as well that are plentiful here at home like wind, like coal. We need to invest in those.”

Burnett wasn’t the first journalist to cheerlead for alternative energy development.

“For anyone with a fresh idea, expensive oil is as good as a subsidy – with no political strings attached,” Wired.com contributing editor Spencer Reiss wrote in December 2005. “And smile when you see a big black $3 or $4 out in front at the gas pump. Those innovators need all the encouragement they can get. Shale oil, uranium, sunlight – there’s enough energy out there for a dozen planets.”

Alternative forms of energy are less efficient and usually less attractive to an open market than oil and coal.

NBC’s Anne Thompson noted on the March 12 “Nightly News” that higher energy prices would be good for alternative forms of energy like solar and wind power, which can cost two to four times as much as coal and oil.

Two scientific studies have suggested clearing land to produce biofuel ingredients will actually contribute more to “global warming” than simply sticking with fossil fuels. The shocking part is that someone in the media actually reported it!

The findings “could force policymakers in the United States and Europe to reevaluate incentives they have adopted to spur production of ethanol-based fuels,” The Washington Post’s Juliet Eilperin reported February 8. “President Bush and many members of Congress have touted expanding biofuel use as an integral element of the nation’s battle against climate change, but these studies suggest that this strategy will damage the planet rather than help protect it.”

We’re talking about big differences, too. One study out of Princeton found that “over 30 years, use of traditional corn-based ethanol would produce twice as much greenhouse gas emissions as regular gasoline” in part due to the removal of trees that help reduce carbon.

Researcher Tim Searchinger estimated “it would take 167 years before biofuels would stop contributing to climate change.”

5. The economy has a fever and the only prescription is more bailouts.

Media myth: From the economic stimulus early in 2008 to the call for a Big Three auto bailout in December the media couldn’t find a bailout it disliked.

Bear Stearns, AIG, Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. 2008 was the year of the government bailout and the news media supported such interventions time and time again.

One particularly vocal advocate for bailouts was CNBC’s Jim Cramer who warned that without a financial bailout the U.S. could face a second Great Depression. He said the same thing months later about an auto industry rescue. Before AIG was given a loan package from the Federal Reserve, Cramer warned that the company absolutely “cannot fail.”

When public opinion was turned against the $700-billion bailout CNN correspondent Carol Costello admitted that the network’s experts were confused. Costello said, “I talked to our own polling experts and they are perplexed by the numbers” which showed a majority against the bailout.

The $25 billion housing bailout of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac was also embraced by the media. “CBS Evening News” called the bill a “lifeline” for the government-sponsored enterprises, but correspondent Jim Axelrod didn’t explain that the “unlimited capital from the government” would come from taxpayers.

But Jerry Bowyer, the chief economist for the Benchmark Financial Network, criticized the Fannie/Freddie bailout: “It’s bad in the short run, unless you are either a highly paid Fannie executive or currently a staffer for any Democratic member of a Congressional Banking Oversight Committee, in other words, a future highly paid Fannie execute [sic],” Bowyer wrote. “In the long run, this will be a huge transfer of wealth to a corrupt bureaucratic and inefficient bureaucracy from the rest of us tax payers.”

Bowyer and other free-market economists have criticized the many bailouts, but their perspective was rarely included in bailout stories.

4. Attack of the Killer Tomatoes

Media myth: A salmonella scare frightened everyone and upset one CNN anchor so much that he called for the impeachment of President Bush – but it turned out peppers were the culprit.

CNN’s Lou Dobbs, host of “Lou Dobbs Tonight,” called for the impeachment of President George W. Bush on June 19, 2008 – but this wasn’t about the Iraq war or some sort of atrocity. It was over tomatoes.

Dobbs placed the blame for the salmonella outbreak that had sickened 383 people by April 2008.

“You know, I have heard a lot of reasons over the years as to why George W. Bush should be impeached,” Dobbs said. “For them to leave the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) in this state, its leadership in this sorry condition and to have no capacity apparently or will to protect the American consumer – that is alone to me sufficient reason to impeach a president who has made this agency possible and has ripped its guts out in its ability to protect the American consumer.”

The media spread fear of tomatoes to the public. In the first four days of the scare – June 8 through June 12 – the three broadcast networks aired 20 stories hyping the salmonella outbreak and pointing the finger at tomatoes.

Ultimately, the misplaced blame cost the tomato industry at least $100 million according to an Associated Press story. The Food and Drug Administration later cleared tomatoes and found the true culprit of the Saint Paul salmonella outbreak: jalapeno or serrano peppers.

3. Oil prices will skyrocket to $200 a barrel, gas to $15.

Media myth: Journalists warned of super-high oil and gas prices, but then the bubble burst.

Journalists predicted skyrocketing oil prices in 2008 up to $400 a barrel.

NBC News chief foreign correspondent Richard Engel warned on the July 1 “NBC Nightly News” an attack by Israel could send oil prices soaring – sending gas prices into territories never imagined.

“I asked an oil analyst that very question,” Engel said. “He said, ‘The price of a barrel of oil: Name your price – $300-$400 a barrel.’”

What would oil at those levels mean? A June 11 Time magazine story by Robert Baer put the price of a gallon of gas at $12 if oil goes to $300 a barrel. In May, Management Information Services Senior Energy Advisor Robert Hirsch told CNBC’s “Squawk Box” the oil at those prices could mean $15-a-gallon gas.

NBC “Nightly News” asked CNBC’s Jim Cramer about those $12-15 predictions. Cramer said “I think that $12 isn’t in the cards. I do see $5 to $6-a-gallon by end of the summer.” But even that prediction turned out to be wrong. Gas prices peaked at $4.11 on July 11 and have since fallen to $1.68 according to AAA.

The news media didn’t anticipate the end of the oil bubble with prices sinking from about $147 at its peak to around $45 Dec. 10.

But there were experts who disagreed.

Equidex President Phillip Gotthelf pointed out on Bloomberg TV on Oct. 7, “I think that the commodities really outlived their, their useful rallies because they’ve exceeded the elasticity of the consumer.”

“And commodities are consumables, they’re not investments. They’re speculative equals sometimes, but they’re certainly not investments.”

According to Gotthelf, those commodities include oil, which he said was poised to go to $40 a barrel or lower in the wake of the global economic turmoil.

“I’m somewhat amused. Goldman Sachs (NYSE:GS) was forecasting $200 a barrel for oil,” Gotthelf said. “I see that their forecasts are getting more and more conservative. I said $200 a barrel was ridiculous. Even $150 I thought was ridiculous. We were looking at $24 a barrel in 2004. Everybody is now making comparisons in the financial sector to the implosion of stocks in 2002, 2003 – the last stock recession. Why shouldn’t we see oil return to $40, maybe even below $40 a barrel?”

2. Welcome to 1929: Great Depression II

Media myth: The news media drew hundreds of parallels to the Depression, despite economic data that is not even close.

According to network reports, America’s finances are “like a house of cards.” The media thought things were so bad that journalists on ABC, CBS and NBC hyped similarities to the Great Depression more than 70 times in the first six months of 2008. An additional tally found at least 157 more comparisons from July 1, 2008 to Oct. 27, 2008.

But that parallel doesn’t hold up, particularly when looking at daily coverage of the stock market crash in 1929. The difference between how the 1929 and 2008 media handled a crisis was profound – with modern journalists hyping every event and their predecessors expressing calm optimism. A scholar of the Depression, Federal Reserve chairman Ben Bernanke said Dec. 1 that there is “no comparison” between the two situations.

In actuality, the economic struggles of 2008 couldn’t really compare to the Depression. At its peak, unemployment skyrocketed to more than 24 percent. Gross domestic product actually dropped four straight years – 1930-1933 – and took until 1941 to again pass 1929 levels. “It was the worst slump in history, and the most protracted,” wrote Paul Johnson in the introduction to Murray Rothbard’s book “America’s Great Depression.” “At one point 34 million men, women, and children were without any income at all,” Johnson continued.

Yet negativity abounded in 2008, outnumbering positive stories 6 to 1 according to BMI’s recent study The Great Media Depression.

CNBC’s “Mad Money” host Jim Cramer went further than most journalists actually warning that the country was in danger of “Great Depression, No. 2.” On “Street Signs” Sept. 11 Cramer excitedly warned that unless the banking system was bailed out, a second Depression could be in the future.

“It’s obvious the bank system is falling apart,” Cramer said. “Let’s save it before it goes to zero.” Two months later on Nov. 11, Cramer again cried for a bailout -- this time for General Motors.

Cramer responded to criticism saying, “I don’t care– for the same reason that AIG was in the business of a criminal conspiracy – big deal,” Cramer said. “It’s like look – we got to bail them out. We have to. We have to keep the Great Depression off the table.”

Ironically in December, Cramer chastised people using Great Depression warnings calling them “scare tactics.”

1. America needs a new, New Deal.

Media myth: Time magazine and other media outlets pushed the idea that Obama must be the next FDR, but they are misrepresenting the impact of the New Deal.

Imagine the classic image of FDR sitting in his car grinning, with a cigarette perched from his mouth. Now imagine it had the face and hands of president-elect Barack Obama instead of FDR.

No, it wasn’t a dream – it was the cover of Time magazine on Nov. 24 which made it clear the media had crowned Obama the new FDR and wanted him to institute a new New Deal.

The photo illustration of Obama and FDR came with a headline that declared: “The New New Deal: What Barack Obama can learn from F.D.R. – and what the Democrats need to do.”

But even before Obama was elected, journalists were looking for FDR. CNN’s Wolf Blitzer asked before the election, “who’s gonna be FDR as opposed to Herbert Hoover?”

In a discussion of economic stimulus packages, ABC’s George Stephanopoulos said on Oct. 19 that he thought Obama “would want to do something like what FDR did in 1932.”

Guests and experts also sounded the call. On CNN, Jeffrey Sachs of the Earth Institute at Columbia University called for a revamped New Deal more than once. Sachs was a favorite expert of CNN in October appearing on 10 of the first 23 days of the month.

But what news reporters, anchors and guest didn’t tell viewers is that according to several economists FDR’s New Deal actually prolonged and deepened the Great Depression.

In a 2004 study, two University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA) economists found that FDR’s policies lengthened the suffering of the Depression by seven years. The two economists specifically blamed anti-free market measures including the National Industrial Recover Act (NIRA) and later the National Relations Act.

Another free-market economist who has written about FDR’s negative impact on the economy is Robert Higgs. Higgs told the Business & Media Institute that a new, New Deal would be disastrous. “I cannot imagine a worse course of action, short of outright socialization of the entire economy. The measures comprised in a new New Deal will not hasten general economic recovery, but will only bulk up the power of government and transfer income to privileged interest groups at the expense of taxpayers and consumers,” Higgs said.”

PC Campus: Academia’s Top 10 Abuses of 2008

2008-12-15T22:21:00.003-06:00

PC Campus: Academia’s Top 10 Abuses of 2008

Filed Under The Latest

By Jason Mattera
Young America’s Foundation Spokesman
December 2008

Banned conservative speakers, stolen votes, assaults on religious liberty, gay English classes, and forbidden Thanksgiving & Christmas celebrations

Political correctness ran amuck in our nation’s school system this past year, and Young America’s Foundation has once again compiled our “best of the worst” academic abuses for 2008. From “free speech zones” to transgendered speakers at military academies, the following list may make you both laugh and cry in the same breath. That probably isn’t too surprising, however, since we are talking about academia after all…

1. The free speech “zone.” A student at Yuba College in California was sent an ultimatum by the school’s president: discontinue handing out gospel booklets or face disciplinary action and possibly expulsion. That’s right—gospel booklets. Ryan Dozier, the 20-year-old student, had the audacity to distribute Christian literature without a school permit, which restricts free speech to an hour each Tuesday and Thursday. Yuba College even directs students to where on campus they are allowed to exhibit free speech. In this case, it’s the school theater. Campus police threatened to arrest Ryan if he didn’t comply with the “free speech zone,” oblivious to the fact that students don’t need permission to exercise the First Amendment’s free speech and religious clauses.

2. Transgendered activists in, pro-life speakers out. Liberal administrators at the University of St. Thomas, a Catholic institution in Minnesota, censored the appearance of prominent pro-life speaker Star Parker because campus officials felt “uncomfortable” and “disturbed” by previous conservative speakers at the school. The University’s mission statement claims it values “the pursuit of truth,” “diversity,” and “meaningful dialogue.” Except, not really—or better yet, as long as the said “pursuit” doesn’t offend leftist predilections. Meanwhile, within the past year, the same school hosted Al Franken, the bombastic liberal comedian, and Debra Davis, a transgendered activist who believes God is a black lesbian. Realizing they had a public relations disaster on their hands, the head honchos at St. Thomas eventually reversed the ban on Star Parker.

3. A new meaning of Duty, Honor, Country. Cadets at West Point, the nation’s foremost military academy, must maintain disciplined, selfless behavior—a precursor to the standards graduates are expected to uphold and reinforce once commissioned as military officers. So how does leftist instructor Judy Rosenstein of the Department of Behavioral Sciences and Leadership encourage cadets to appreciate the military’s code of conduct? By hosting a transgendered speaker in class, of course! “Allyson” Robinson, a West Point grad him-, er, herself, switched genders after leaving the Army. Upon returning to West Point as a guest speaker, “Mrs.” Robinson found it “worrisome” that the student composition seemed more socially conservative than when “she” was a student. Perhaps West Point’s leadership should confine speaker invitations to those whose behavior, if emulated, would not get cadets booted from the academy, much less the Army.

4. 2008’s stolen election? Columbia University recently polled students on whether or not they would support the return of the Navy’s Reserve Officers’ Training Corps (ROTC) to campus after a 40-year absence. Columbia claimed the referendum lost by 39 votes. However, the University inexplicably closed the online poll at different times for different students and discarded more than 1,900 votes out of the 4,905 cast. To boot, the university showcased its “anti-fraud” measures, revealing they caught one person who purportedly voted 276 times! So much for secure, front-end identification control. In the end, 1,502 “valid” NAYs trumped the 1,463 AYEs. Does anyone else smell some anti-military electioneering rats?

5. When English class turns gay. Heads turned when Deerfield High School in Deerfield, Illinois required this book as part of an Advanced Placement English literature course: Angels in America: A Gay Fantasia on National Themes. The book is laced with graphic sexual content, much of it too inflammatory to print here—although there are “milder” exchanges fit to report, such as one character pleading with his sexual partner to “infect” and “make [him] bleed.” Supporters of Angels in America say the book is useful because it depicts “forgiveness, kindness, and compassion,” as if HIV-positive sodomy is the best way to promote empathy to minors.

6. You can’t pray here! The First Amendment, is it a bestowed right given from above and protected by our government or a meaningless, antiquated concept to be disposed of? If you’re the folks at the College of Alameda in California, you’d pick the latter. How else do you explain their threatening to expel a student who prayed on campus? It all started when a student, Kandy Kyriacou, visited her professor to give her a Christmas gift. But when Kandy saw that her teacher was ill, she offered to pray for her. The professor agreed. That’s when Derek Piazza, another professor, walked in and freaked out that a prayer—gasp, a prayer—was occurring on college premises. “You can’t be doing that in here,” Piazza purportedly barked. Kandy received a retroactive “intent to suspend” letter from the administration, claiming that she was guilty of “disruptive or insulting behavior” and “persistent abuse of” college employees. Further infractions would result in expulsion, the letter read.

7. Hey, that feather cap is racist. For decades, kindergarten classes in the Claremont district of California have celebrated Thanksgiving by dressing up as Pilgrims and Indians and sharing a feast. Harmless, eh? Apparently not. In a letter to her daughter’s elementary school teacher, Michelle Raheja, an English professor at University of California-Riverside, fumed that such activities are “dehumanizing” and serve as a “racist stereotype.” In fact, Ms. Raheja whined that the Thanksgiving costume party is comparable to parading children around as “slaves” and “Jews.” The school district capitulated, and now the toddlers are prohibited from wearing “their hand-made bonnets, headdresses and fringed vests.”

8. Ho, ho, forgetaboutit! Who’s offended by Christmas decorations? All the white liberals who celebrate Kwanza? Must be. Florida Gulf Coast University’s president, Wilson Bradshaw, sent holiday festivities packing because he didn’t know “how best to observe the season in ways that honor and respect all traditions.” Holiday décor wasn’t the only thing to go, under Mr. Bradshaw. The school’s greeting card contest got tossed as well. Cheer up, says, the President—Christmas merriment was replaced with an “ugly sweater competition.” Mr. Bradshaw ultimately had a change of heart, after his embarrassing attempt at censorship became public.

9. Leftist factions compete on who is more multicultural. When eco-fanatics at UC-Berkeley illegally saddled themselves in trees on campus and hurled urine and feces to block the construction of a multi-million dollar athletic facility, probably the last thing they expected was to be called racists. Yet the school’s chancellor, Robert Birgeneau, labeled them just that, saying the environmental radicals were impeding the completion of a new athletic facility designed to attract “minority student athletes.” Puzzled that the chancellor played the race card on them, the tree dwellers argued that “three of the final four” protestors were “Latinos” and the very first hijacker was a “Native American.” One of the Berkeley zealots, who goes by the name “Running Wolf,” said that Mr. Birgenaeau attempted “to pit colored against colored.”

10. Who knew? Universal health care is actually a non partisan issue. Administrators at the College of St. Catherine in St. Paul, Minnesota—the nation’s largest Catholic women’s college—unexpectedly blocked young conservatives on campus from hosting Bay Buchanan, a popular conservative commentator and U.S. Treasurer under President Reagan. College officials deemed Ms. Buchanan’s remarks on “Feminism and the 2008 Election” too politically charged, citing concerns about the school’s tax status. Those same “concerns,” mind you, didn’t prohibit the school from sponsoring programs that push for universal healthcare and minimum wage increases or hosting Frank Kroncke, an anti-war radical who is reliving the Vietnam days. But Bay Buchanan? Well, she’s partisan, according to St. Catherine’s administration.

No, I'm not mean......

2008-12-02T12:22:00.001-06:00

No, I'm Not Mean
by Tibor R. Machan

 
       The position of someone who defends human liberty, freedom from
coercion among people, is sometimes quite irksome.  That's because those
who want to coerce others mostly give as their reason that they want to be
of help.  Virtually every government program funded by taxation, money
extorted from citizens, is justified by citing the needs and wants of
people who will go without government support if the program is
discontinued.

       So those of us who prize human liberty above every other social
condition will seem, on casual inspection, to lack compassion and
generosity. We will be saying "no" to numerous public policies proposed as
ways to provide for the helpless or needy.  In fact the bulk of those in
Western societies who advocate coercive policies that expropriate the
labor and resources of citizens say that they do so because they want to
eliminate poverty, deprivation, ignorance, illness, and other untoward
circumstances people face.  Opposing such coercive measures then is taken
simply to be mean, hardhearted, and ungenerous. 

       Nearly all the responses I receive to my criticisms of government
coercion accuse me of lacking compassion, of wishing that those in need go
unaided, unsupported, be left helpless.  But the charge is wrong, very
wrong indeed.

       Suppose one objects to burglaries, robberies or holdups. And
suppose those perpetrating these tend, in the main, to use the loot they
take for various helpful purposes.  They buy food and furniture and
medicine with what they have stolen.  And maybe without the stolen
resources they would find it troublesome to purchase these things for
themselves and their families.

       Does opposition to burglaries, robberies, and holdups imply even
in the slightest that one is opposed to the would be perpetrator of these
crimes getting the benefits the stolen wealth could get them?  Does
opposition to the violent, aggressive, hostile means of obtaining the
means for getting those benefits imply that one begrudges the benefits
that can be gained with what was stolen? More drastically, does opposition
to rape mean being opposed to sexual satisfaction for those who would rape
others?

       Of course not.  Millions of people oppose crimes that involve
taking things from people at gunpoint and the like, yet all these millions
do not see anything wrong with the beneficiaries gaining what they need
and want.  In fact, millions of people who oppose such criminal takings
voluntarily contribute to charities, emergency funds, such as the Red
Cross or the Salvation Army.  Indeed, Americans, specifically, are the
most giving citizens in the world, as can be observed whenever some people
around the globe are struck with natural disasters. 

       Most of us who champion a fully free society also support
voluntary means for giving aid to those who need it.  There is no one in
the libertarian movement I know of who opposes such means although they
all, without fail, oppose the coercive approach the government uses to
help people.  Many of us also argue that voluntary means for helping those
in need of help are more effective and certainly more ethical than
government's coercive ways.  Some have researched this thoroughly and have
concluded that voluntary help is, overall, superior to coercively supplied
help not only because coercion is wrong in itself but also because the
voluntary approach tends to support a culture of mutual aid throughout a
society.

       No, I am not mean.  I am personally a frequent contributor to
voluntary efforts to lend a hand even while my focus in my writings
happens to be mostly on eliminating coercion from human interactions.
That may be because I personally grew up in a country that was a police
state, where coercion of the citizenry was routine, the norm, and to even
argue against it could land one in a gulag. But just because my efforts
focus on securing or protecting the right to liberty of all it does not
follow that I and those like me fail to be generous, compassionate,
helpful, and so forth when such conduct is called for.  But we oppose
efforts to make such conduct legally mandatory! It is clear to us, also,
that mandated charity or compassion has no moral worth at all since it
isn't done of one's own free will, a basic requirement of all moral or
ethical conduct.

Saddam's WMDs FOUND!!!!!

2008-12-01T11:34:00.002-06:00

Saddam's WMDs FOUND

New evidence out of Iraq suggests the U.S. effort to track down Saddam Hussein's missing weapons of mass destruction is having better success than is being reported.

Key assertions by the intelligence community widely judged in the media and by critics of President Bush as having been false are turning out to have been true after all.

But this stunning news has received little attention from the major media, and the president's critics continue to insist that "no weapons" have been found.

In virtually every case -- chemical, biological, nuclear and ballistic missiles -- the United States has found the weapons and the programs that the Iraqi dictator successfully concealed for 12 years from U.N. weapons inspectors.

The Iraq Survey Group, ISG, whose intelligence analysts are managed by Charles Duelfer, a former State Department official and deputy chief of the U.N.-led arms-inspection teams, has found "hundreds of cases of activities that were prohibited" under U.N. Security Council resolutions, a senior administration official tells Insight.

"There is a long list of charges made by the U.S. that have been confirmed, but none of this seems to mean anything because the weapons that were unaccounted for by the United Nations remain unaccounted for."

Both Duelfer and his predecessor, David Kay, reported to Congress that the evidence they had found on the ground in Iraq showed Saddam's regime was in "material violation" of U.N. Security Council Resolution 1441, the last of 17 resolutions that promised "serious consequences" if Iraq did not make a complete disclosure of its weapons programs and dismantle them in a verifiable manner.

The United States cited Iraq's refusal to comply with these demands as one justification for going to war.

Both Duelfer and Kay found Iraq had "a clandestine network

of laboratories and safe houses with equipment that was suitable to continuing its prohibited chemical- and biological-weapons [BW] programs," the official said. "They found a prison laboratory where we suspect they tested biological weapons on human subjects."

They found equipment for "uranium-enrichment centrifuges" whose only plausible use was as part of a clandestine nuclear-weapons program. In all these cases, "Iraqi scientists had been told before the war not to declare their activities to the U.N. inspectors," the official said.

But while the president's critics and the media might plausibly hide behind ambiguity and a lack of sensational-looking finds for not reporting some discoveries, in the case of Saddam's ballistic-missile programs they have no excuse for their silence.

"Where were the missiles? We found them," another senior administration official told Insight.

"Saddam Hussein's prohibited missile programs are as close to a slam dunk as you will ever find for violating United Nations resolutions," the first official said. Both senior administration officials spoke to Insight on condition that neither their name nor their agency be identified, but their accounts of what the United States has found in Iraq coincided in every major area.

When former weapons inspector Kay reported to Congress in January that the United States had found "no stockpiles" of forbidden weapons in Iraq, his conclusions made front-page news. But when he detailed what the ISG had found in testimony before the House Permanent Select Committee on Intelligence last October, few took notice.

Among Kay's revelations, which officials tell Insight have been amplified in subsequent inspections in recent weeks:

A prison laboratory complex that may have been used for human testing of BW agents and "that Iraqi officials working to prepare the U.N. inspections were explicitly ordered not to declare to the U.N." Why was Saddam interested in testing biological-warfare agents on humans if he didn't have a biological-weapons program?
"Reference strains" of a wide variety of biological-weapons agents were found beneath the sink in the home of a prominent Iraqi BW scientist. "We thought it was a big deal," a senior administration official said. "But it has been written off [by the press] as a sort of 'starter set.'"
New research on BW-applicable agents, brucella and Congo-Crimean hemorrhagic fever, and continuing work on ricin and aflatoxin that were not declared to the United Nations.
A line of unmanned aerial vehicles, UAVs, or drones, "not fully declared at an undeclared production facility and an admission that they had tested one of their declared UAVs out to a range of 500 kilometers [311 miles], 350 kilometers [217 miles] beyond the permissible limit."
"Continuing covert capability to manufacture fuel propellant useful only for prohibited Scud-variant missiles, a capability that was maintained at least until the end of 2001 and that cooperating Iraqi scientists have said they were told to conceal from the U.N."
"Plans and advanced design work for new long-range missiles with ranges up to at least 1,000 kilometers [621 miles] -- well beyond the 150-kilometer-range limit [93 miles] imposed by the U.N. Missiles of a 1,000-kilometer range would have allowed Iraq to threaten targets throughout the Middle East, including Ankara [Turkey], Cairo [Egypt] and Abu Dhabi [United Arab Emirates]."

In addition, through interviews with Iraqi scientists, seized documents and other evidence, the ISG learned the Iraqi government had made "clandestine attempts between late 1999 and 2002 to obtain from North Korea technology related to 1,300-kilometer-range [807 miles] ballistic missiles -- probably the No Dong -- 300-kilometer-range [186 miles] antiship cruise missiles and other prohibited military equipment," Kay reported.

In testimony before Congress on March 30, Duelfer, revealed the ISG had found evidence of a "crash program" to construct new plants capable of making chemical- and biological-warfare agents.

The ISG also found a previously undeclared program to build a "high-speed rail gun," a device apparently designed for testing nuclear-weapons materials. That came in addition to 500 tons of natural uranium stockpiled at Iraq's main declared nuclear site south of Baghdad, which International Atomic Energy Agency spokesman Mark Gwozdecky acknowledged to Insight had been intended for "a clandestine nuclear-weapons program."

In taking apart Iraq's clandestine procurement network, Duelfer said his investigators had discovered that "the primary source of illicit financing for this system was oil smuggling conducted through government-to-government protocols negotiated with neighboring countries [and] from kickback payments made on contracts set up through the U.N. oil-for-food program."

What the president's critics and the media widely have portrayed as the most dramatic failure of the U.S. case against Saddam has been the claimed failure to find "stockpiles" of chemical and biological weapons. But in a June 2003 Washington Post op-ed, former chief U.N. weapons inspector Rolf Ekeus called such criticism "a distortion and a trivialization of a major threat to international peace and security."

The October 2002 National Intelligence Estimate on Iraqi Weapons of Mass Destruction concluded that Saddam "probably has stocked at least 100 metric tons [MT] and possibly as much as 500 MT of CW [chemical warfare] agents -- much of it added in the last year."

That assessment was based, in part, on conclusions contained in the final report from U.N. weapons inspectors in 1999, which highlighted discrepancies in what the Iraqis reported to the United Nations and the amount of precursor chemicals U.N. arms inspectors could document Iraq had imported but for which it no longer could account.

Until now, Bush's critics say, no stockpiles of CW agents made with those precursors have been found. The snap conclusion they draw is that the administration "lied" to the American people to create a pretext for invading Iraq.

But what are "stockpiles" of CW agents supposed to look like? Was anyone seriously expecting Saddam to have left behind freshly painted warehouses packed with chemical munitions, all neatly laid out in serried rows, with labels written in English?

Or did they think that a captured Saddam would guide U.S. troops to smoking vats full of nerve gas in an abandoned factory?

Stockpiles found

In fact, as recent evidence made public by a former operations officer for the Coalition Provisional Authority's intelligence unit in Iraq shows, some of those stockpiles have been found - not all at once, and not all in nice working order -- but found all the same.

Douglas Hanson was a U.S. Army cavalry reconnaissance officer for 20 years, and a veteran of Gulf War I. He was an atomic demolitions munitions security officer and a nuclear, biological and chemical defense officer. As a civilian analyst in Iraq last summer, he worked for an operations intelligence unit of the CPA in Iraq, and later, with the newly formed Ministry of Science and Technology, which was responsible for finding new, nonlethal employment for Iraqi WMD scientists.

In an interview with Insight and in an article he wrote for the online magazine AmericanThinker.com, Hanson examines reports from U.S. combat units and public information confirming that many of Iraq's CW stockpiles have indeed been found.

Until now, however, journalists have devoted scant attention to this evidence, in part because it contradicts the story line they have been putting forward since the U.S.-led inspections began after the war.

But another reason for the media silence may stem from the seemingly undramatic nature of the "finds" Hanson and others have described. The materials that constitute Saddam's chemical-weapons "stockpiles" look an awful lot like pesticides, which they indeed resemble.

"Pesticides are the key elements in the chemical-agent arena," Hanson says. "In fact, the general pesticide chemical formula (organophosphate) is the 'grandfather' of modern-day nerve agents."

The United Nations was fully aware that Saddam had established his chemical-weapons plants under the guise of a permitted civilian chemical-industry infrastructure. Plants inspected in the early 1990s as CW production facilities had been set up to appear as if they were producing pesticides, or in the case of a giant plant near Fallujah, chlorine, which is used to produce mustard gas.

When coalition forces entered Iraq, "huge warehouses and caches of 'commercial and agricultural' chemicals were seized and painstakingly tested by Army and Marine chemical specialists," Hanson writes. "What was surprising was how quickly the ISG refuted the findings of our ground forces and how silent they have been on the significance of these caches."

Caches of "commercial and agricultural" chemicals don't match the expectation of "stockpiles" of chemical weapons. But, in fact, that is precisely what they are. "At a very minimum," Hanson tells Insight, "they were storing the precursors to restart a chemical-warfare program very quickly."

Kay and Duelfer came to a similar conclusion, telling Congress under oath that Saddam had built new facilities and stockpiled the materials to relaunch production of chemical and biological weapons at a moment's notice. At Karbala, U.S. troops stumbled upon 55-gallon drums of pesticides at what appeared to be a very large "agricultural supply" area, Hanson says. Some of the drums were stored in a "camouflaged bunker complex" that was shown to reporters -- with unpleasant results.

"More than a dozen soldiers, a Knight-Ridder reporter, a CNN cameraman, and two Iraqi POWs came down with symptoms consistent with exposure to a nerve agent," Hanson says. "But later ISG tests resulted in a proclamation of negative, end of story, nothing to see here, etc., and the earlier findings and injuries dissolved into nonexistence. Left unexplained is the small matter of the obvious pains taken to disguise the cache of ostensibly legitimate pesticides. One wonders about the advantage an agricultural-commodities business gains by securing drums of pesticide in camouflaged bunkers 6 feet underground. The 'agricultural site' was also colocated with a military ammunition dump -- evidently nothing more than a coincidence in the eyes of the ISG."

That wasn't the only significant find by coalition troops of probable CW stockpiles, Hanson believes. Near the northern Iraqi town of Bai'ji, where Saddam had built a chemical-weapons plant known to the United States from nearly 12 years of inspections, elements of the 4th Infantry Division found 55-gallon drums containing a substance identified through mass spectrometry analysis as cyclosarin -- a nerve agent.

Nearby were surface-to-surface and surface-to-air missiles, gas masks and a mobile laboratory that could have been used to mix chemicals at the site.

"Of course, later tests by the experts revealed that these were only the ubiquitous pesticides that everybody was turning up," Hanson says. "It seems Iraqi soldiers were obsessed with keeping ammo dumps insect-free, according to the reading of the evidence now enshrined by the conventional wisdom that 'no WMD stockpiles have been discovered.'"

At Taji -- an Iraqi weapons complex as large as the District of Columbia -- U.S. combat units discovered more "pesticides" stockpiled in specially built containers, smaller in diameter but much longer than the standard 55-gallon drum.

Hanson says he still recalls the military sending digital images of the canisters to his office, where his boss at the Ministry of Science and Technology translated the Arabic-language markings. "They were labeled as pesticides," he says. "Gee, you sure have got a lot of pesticides stored in ammo dumps."

Again, this January, Danish forces found 120-millimeter mortar shells filled with a mysterious liquid that initially tested positive for blister agents. But subsequent tests by the United States disputed that finding.

"If it wasn't a chemical agent, what was it?" Hanson asks. "More pesticides? Dish-washing detergent? From this old soldier's perspective, I gain nothing from putting a liquid in my mortar rounds unless that stuff will do bad things to the enemy."

The discoveries Hanson describes are not dramatic. And that's the problem: Finding real stockpiles in grubby ammo dumps doesn't fit the image the media and the president's critics carefully have fed to the public of what Iraq's weapons ought to look like. A senior administration official who has gone through the intelligence reporting from Iraq as well as the earlier reports from U.N. arms inspectors refers to another well-documented allegation.

"The Iraqis admitted they had made 3.9 tons of VX," a powerful nerve gas, but claimed they had never weaponized it. The U.N. inspectors "felt they had more. But where did it go?" The Iraqis never provided any explanation of what had happened to their VX stockpiles.

What does 3.9 tons of VX look like? "It could fit in one large garage," the official says. Assuming, of course, that Saddam would assemble every bit of VX gas his scientists had produced at a single site, that still amounts to one large garage in an area the size of the state of California.

Senior administration officials stress that the investigation will continue as inspectors comb through millions of pages of documents in Iraq and attempt to interview Iraqi weapons scientists who have been trained all their professional lives to conceal their activities from the outside world.

"The conditions under which the ISG is working are not very conducive," one official said. "But this president wants the truth to come out. This is not an exercise in spinning or censoring."

2008-12-01T11:00:00.002-06:00

Works and Days 10 Random, Politically Incorrect Thoughts

1. Four years of high-school Latin would dramatically arrest the decline in American education. In particular, such instruction would do more for minority youths than all the ‘role model’ diversity sermons on Harriet Tubman, Malcolm X, Montezuma, and Caesar Chavez put together. Nothing so enriches the vocabulary, so instructs about English grammar and syntax, so creates a discipline of the mind, an elegance of expression, and serves as a gateway to the thinking and values of Western civilization as mastery of a page of Virgil or Livy (except perhaps Sophocles’s Antigone in Greek or Thucydides’ dialogue at Melos). After some 20 years of teaching mostly minority youth Greek, Latin, and ancient history and literature in translation (1984-2004), I came to the unfortunate conclusion that ethnic studies, women studies—indeed, anything “studies”— were perhaps the fruits of some evil plot dreamed up by illiberal white separatists to ensure that poor minority students in the public schools and universities were offered only a third-rate education.

2. Hollywood is going the way of Detroit. The actors are programmed and pretty rather than interesting looking and unique. They, of course, are overpaid (they do to films what Lehman Brothers’ execs did to stocks), mediocre, and politicized. The producers and directors are rarely talented, mostly unoriginal—and likewise politicized. A pack-mentality rules. Do one movie on a comic superhero—and suddenly we get ten, all worse than the first. One noble lion cartoon movie earns us eagle, penguin and most of Noah’s Arc sequels. Now see poorer remakes of movies that were never good to begin with. I doubt we will ever see again a Western like Shane, the Searchers, High Noon, or the Wild Bunch. If one wishes to see a fine film, they are now usually foreign, such as Das Boot or Breaker Morant. Watching any recent war movie (e.g., Iraq as the Rape of Nanking) is as if someone put uniforms on student protestors and told them to consult their professors for the impromptu script.

3. All the old media brands of our youth have been tarnished and all but discredited. No one picks up Harpers or Atlantic expecting to read a disinterested story on politics or culture. (I pass on their inane accounts of ‘getaways’ and food.) The New York Times and Washington Post are as likely to have op-eds as news stories on the front page. Newsweek and Time became organs for paint-by-numbers Obamism, teased with People Magazine-like gossip pieces (at least, their editors still cared enough to seem hurt when charged with overt bias). NBC, ABC, and CBS would now make a Chet Huntley or Eric Sevareid turn over in his grave. A Keith Olbermann would not have been allowed to do commercials in the 1950s. Strangely, the media has offered up fashionably liberal politics coupled with metrosexual elite tastes in fashions, clothes, housing, food, and the good life, as if there were no contradictions between the two. No wonder media is so enthralled with the cool Obama and his wife. Both embody the new nexus between Eurosocialism in the abstract and the hip aristocratic life in the concrete.

4. After the junk bond meltdown, the S&L debacle, and now the financial panic, in just a few years the financial community destroyed the ancient wisdom: deal in personal trust; your word is your bond; avoid extremes; treat the money you invest for others as something sacred; don’t take any more perks than you would wish others to take; don’t borrow what you couldn’t suddenly pay back; imagine the worse case financial scenario and expect it very may well happen; the wealthier you become the more humble you should act. And for what did our new Jay Goulds do all this? A 20,000 square-foot mansion instead of the old 6,000 sq. ft. expansive house? A Gulfstream in lieu of first class commercial? You milk your company, cash in your stock bonuses, enjoy your $50 million cash pile, and then get what—a Rolex instead of a reliable Timex? A Maserati for a Mercedes, a gold bathroom spout in preference to brushed pewter? The extra splurge was marginal and hardly worth the stain of avarice on one’s immortal soul.

5. California is now a valuable touchstone to the country, a warning of what not to do. Rarely has a single generation inherited so much natural wealth and bounty from the investment and hard work of those more noble now resting in our cemeteries—and squandered that gift within a generation. Compare the vast gulf from old Governor Pat Brown to Gray Davis or Arnold Schwarzenegger. We did not invest in many dams, canals, rails, and airports (though we use them all to excess); we sued each other rather than planned; wrote impact statements rather than left behind infrastructure; we redistributed, indulged, blamed, and so managed all at once to create a state with about the highest income and sales taxes and the worst schools, roads, hospitals, and airports. A walk through downtown San Francisco, a stroll up the Fresno downtown mall, a drive along highway 101 (yes, in many places it is still a four-lane, pot-holed highway), an afternoon at LAX, a glance at the catalogue of Cal State Monterey, a visit to the park in Parlier—all that would make our forefathers weep. We can’t build a new nuclear plant; can’t drill a new offshore oil well; can’t build an all-weather road across the Sierra; can’t build a few tracts of new affordable houses in the Bay Area; can’t build a dam for a water-short state; and can’t create even a mediocre passenger rail system. Everything else—well, we do that well.

6. Something has happened to the generic American male accent. Maybe it is urbanization; perhaps it is now an affectation to sound precise and caring with a patina of intellectual authority; perhaps it is the fashion culture of the metrosexual; maybe it is the influence of the gay community in arts and popular culture. Maybe the ubiquitous new intonation comes from the scarcity of salty old jobs in construction, farming, or fishing. But increasingly to meet a young American male about 25 is to hear a particular nasal stress, a much higher tone than one heard 40 years ago, and, to be frank, to listen to a precious voice often nearly indistinguishable from the female. How indeed could one make Westerns these days, when there simply is not anyone left who sounds like John Wayne, Richard Boone, Robert Duvall, or Gary Cooper much less a Struther Martin, Jack Palance, L.Q. Jones, or Ben Johnson? I watched the movie Twelve O’clock High the other day, and Gregory Peck and Dean Jagger sounded liked they were from another planet. I confess over the last year, I have been interviewed a half-dozen times on the phone, and had no idea at first whether a male or female was asking the questions. All this sounds absurd, but I think upon reflection readers my age (55) will attest they have had the same experience. In the old days, I remember only that I first heard a variant of this accent with the old Paul Lynde character actor in one of the Flubber movies; now young men sound closer to his camp than to a Jack Palance or Alan Ladd.

7. We have given political eccentricity a bad name. There used to be all sorts of classy individualists, liberal and conservative alike, like Everett Dirksen, J. William Fulbright, Margaret Chase Smith, or Sam Ervin; today we simply see the obnoxious who claim to be eccentric like a Barbara Boxer, Al Franken, Barney Frank, or Harry Reid. The loss is detectable even in diction and manner; Dirksen was no angel, but he was witty, charming, insightful; Frank is no angel, but he merely rants and pontificates. Watch the You Tube exchange between Harvard Law Graduate Frank and Harvard Law Graduate Rains as they arrogantly dismiss their trillion-dollar Fannie/Freddie meltdown in the making. I suppose it is the difference between the Age of Belief and the Age of Nihilism.

8. Do not farm. There is only loss. To the degree that anyone makes money farming, it is a question of a vertically-integrated enterprise making more in shipping, marketing, selling, packing, and brokering than it loses on the other end in growing. No exceptions. Food prices stay high, commodity prices stay low. That is all ye need to know. Try it and see.

9. As I wrote earlier, the shrill Left is increasingly far more vicious these days than the conservative fringe, and about like the crude Right of the 1950s. Why? I am not exactly sure, other than the generic notion that utopians often believe that their anointed ends justify brutal means. Maybe it is that the Right already had its Reformation when Buckley and others purged the extremists—the Birchers, the neo-Confederates, racialists, the fluoride-in-the-water conspiracists, anti-Semites, and assorted nuts.—from the conservative ranks in a way the Left has never done with the 1960s radicals that now reappear in the form of Michael Moore, Bill Ayers, Cindy Sheehan, Moveon.org, the Daily Kos, etc. Not many Democrats excommunicated Moveon.org for its General Betray-Us ad. Most lined up to see the premier of Moore’s mythodrama. Barack Obama could subsidize a Rev. Wright or email a post-9/11 Bill Ayers in a way no conservative would even dare speak to a David Duke or Timothy McVeigh—and what Wright said was not all that different from what Duke spouts. What separated Ayers from McVeigh was chance; had the stars aligned, the Weathermen would have killed hundreds as they planned.

10. The K-12 public education system is essentially wrecked. No longer can any professor expect an incoming college freshman to know what Okinawa, John Quincy Adams, Shiloh, the Parthenon, the Reformation, John Locke, the Second Amendment, or the Pythagorean Theorem is. An entire American culture, the West itself, its ideas and experiences, have simply vanished on the altar of therapy. This upcoming generation knows instead not to judge anyone by absolute standards (but not why so); to remember to say that its own Western culture is no different from, or indeed far worse than, the alternatives; that race, class, and gender are, well, important in some vague sense; that global warming is manmade and very soon will kill us all; that we must have hope and change of some undefined sort; that AIDs is no more a homosexual- than a heterosexual-prone disease; and that the following things and people for some reason must be bad, or at least must in public company be said to be bad (in no particular order): Wal-Mart, cowboys, the Vietnam War, oil companies, coal plants, nuclear power, George Bush, chemicals, leather, guns, states like Utah and Kansas, Sarah Palin, vans and SUVs.

7 untruths about Sarah Palin

2008-11-30T18:33:00.003-06:00

1) Palin “Joined a Secessionist Political Party”

The Charge: Unsubstantiated Internet reports insisted Palin was once a member of the Alaska Independence Party, which critics call a secessionist political movement and supporters say is dedicated to seeking greater state control over federal lands across Alaska.

The Facts: Palin has been a registered Republican since 1982. There is no record of her ever being a member of the AIP, or any party but the GOP. Palin’s husband has been a member of the AIP in the past, but since 2002 has been a registered independent.

2) Palin Supported a “Nazi Sympathizer”

The Charge: “Palin was a supporter of Pat Buchanan, a right-winger or, as many Jews call him: a Nazi sympathizer,” Obama Florida spokesman Mark Bubriski was quoted as saying in a Miami Herald article.

The Facts: While mayor of Wasilla, Palin wore a Buchanan button during the sometimes presidential candidate’s 1999 visit. But Palin actually supported Steve Forbes in 2000, and served as a co-chair on his Alaska campaign.

In the weeks after the 1999 report of her wearing the Buchanan button, Palin said: “When presidential candidates visit our community, I am always happy to meet them. I’ll even put on their button when handed one as a polite gesture of respect. … The article may have left your readers with the perception that I am endorsing this candidate, as opposed to welcoming his visit to Wasilla.”

3) Palin “Wants Creationism Taught in School”

The Charge: Palin opposes the teaching of evolution, and would mandate the teaching of creationism in the state’s public schools.

The Facts: Palin said during her 2006 gubernatorial campaign that she would not push the state Board of Education to add creation-based alternatives to the state’s required curriculum, or look for creationism advocates when she appointed board members. She has kept this pledge, according to the Associated Press.

Palin has spoken in favor of classroom discussions of creationism, in some cases. “I don’t think there should be a prohibition against debate if it comes up in class. It doesn’t have to be part of the curriculum,” Palin told the Anchorage Daily News in a 2006 interview.

4) Palin “Was Nearly Recalled” While Mayor

The Charge: Palin was so controversial as mayor of Wasilla that she was almost recalled by a popular voter movement.

The Facts: The Wasilla City Council considered but never took up a recall motion after she fired a longtime police chief, who subsequently brought a lawsuit. A citizen’s group dropped their recall bid, and a judge ruled Palin had the authority to fire the chief.

5) Palin “Opposes Sex Education”

The Charge: Palin opponents say she supported the end of all sex education in public schools. In light of her daughter’s presumably unplanned teen pregnancy, this has been a particularly well discussed Internet topic.

The Facts: “The explicit sex-ed programs will not find my support,” Palin wrote in a 2006 questionnaire distributed among gubernatorial candidates. Palin favors abstinence-based sex education programs.

6) “This Picture Proves Palin is …”

The Charge: A slew of fake, Photoshopped or misdated photographs on the Internet purport to show Palin in any number of embarrassing or compromising poses. One photo claimed to show Palin standing poolside, wearing an American flag-themed bikini, toting a rifle with telescopic sight.

The Facts: The various photos are being discredited and shown to be fake on a number of Web sites. The original of the so-called bikini shot, probably the best-known of the pictures, was shown to have been taken of another woman, with Palin’s head Photoshopped above the body.

7) Palin is the grandmother, and not the mother, of Trig Palin

The Charge: The most salacious rumor of all, this theory holds that Palin did not give birth to her son Trig in April, and was actually covering up for her daughter, Bristol.

The Facts: There are a number of photographs showing an apparently pregnant Sarah Palin, as well as a number of published eyewitness accounts of her pregnancy. These include First Lady Laura Bush, who says she spoke with a pregnant Palin at a governor’s conference in February. An assignment manager for KTVA news in Anchorage, Cherie Shirey, has also been quoted saying: “We worked with Governor Palin many times in 2008. Our reporters worked her on location and in the studio and I worked with her myself. She was definitely pregnant. You could see it in her belly and her face. The whole idea that Sarah Palin wasn’t pregnant with Trig is completely, absolutely absurd.”

The McCain campaign, in an apparent effort to counteract the rumors, announced last weekend that Bristol Palin is five months pregnant, which indicated she would have become pregnant before Trig was born.

20 general differences between conservatives and liberals...

2008-11-30T18:21:00.004-06:00

From an email received:

Conservatives and liberals approach almost every issue with completely different philosophies, underlying assumptions, and methods. That's why it's so hard to find genuine compromise between conservatism and liberalism -- because not only are liberals almost always wrong, their solutions almost always make things worse. Editor's Note (from Meg): Unfortunately, today's Republican party has a bunch of liberals in conservative's clothing, giving a bad name to what conservatism is. I am looking forward to the restructuring of the conservative movement to get back to the basic principles of freedom this country was founded on.

CONSERVATIVES believe that judges should act like umpires instead of legislating from the bench. That means that judges should determine whether laws are permissible under the Constitution and settle debates about the meanings of laws, not impose their will based on their ideological leanings.
LIBERALS view judges as a backdoor method of getting unpopular left-leaning legislation passed. They don't want umpires, they want political partisans in black robes who will side with them first and then come up with a rationale to explain it.

CONSERVATIVES believe that individual Americans have a right to defend themselves and their families with guns, and that right cannot be taken away by any method short of a Constitutional Amendment, which conservatives would oppose.
LIBERALS believe that by taking arms away from law-abiding citizens, they can prevent criminals, who aren't going to abide by gun control laws, from using guns in the commission of crimes.

CONSERVATIVES believe that we should live in a color blind society where every individual is judged on the content of his character and the merits of his actions.
LIBERALS believe that it's OK to discriminate based on race as long as it primarily benefits minority groups.

CONSERVATIVES believe that entrepreneurs who amass great wealth through their own efforts are good for the country and shouldn't be punished for being successful.
LIBERALS view successful business owners as people who cheated the system somehow or got lucky. That's why they don't respect high achievers and see them as little more than piggy banks for their programs.

CONSERVATIVES believe that abortion ends the life of an innocent child, and since they believe that infanticide is wrong, they oppose abortion.
LIBERALS, despite what they'll tell you, believe that abortion ends the life of an innocent child, but they prefer killing the baby to inconveniencing the mother.

CONSERVATIVES believe in confronting and defeating enemies of the United States before they can harm American citizens.
LIBERALS believe in using law enforcement measures to deal with terrorism, which means that they feel we should allow terrorists to train, plan, and actually attempt to kill Americans before we try to arrest them -- as if you can just send the police around to pick up a terrorist mastermind hiding in Iran or the wilds of Pakistan.

CONSERVATIVES (but not necessarily Republicans) believe it's vitally important to the future of the country to reduce the size of government, keep taxes low, balance the budget, and get this country out of debt.
LIBERALS believe in big government and high taxes, and they have never met a new spending program they didn't like, whether we will have to go into debt to pay for it or not.

CONSERVATIVES believe that government, by its very nature, tends to be inefficient, incompetent, wasteful, and power hungry. That's why they believe that the government that governs least, governs best.
LIBERALS think that the solution to every problem is another government program. Even when those new programs create new problems, often worse than the ones that were being fixed in the first place, the solution is always another government program.

CONSERVATIVES are patriotic, believe that America is a great nation, and are primarily interested in looking out for the good of the country. That's why they believe in "American exceptionalism" and "America first."
LIBERALS are more concerned about what Europeans think of us and about staying in the good graces of the corrupt bureaucrats who control the United Nations than about looking out for the best interests of this nation.

CONSERVATIVES believe in God and think that the Constitution has been twisted by liberal judges to illegitimately try to purge Christianity from the public square. They also believe that this country has been successful in large part because it is a good Christian nation, and if the country ever turns away from the Lord, it will cease to prosper.
LIBERALS are hostile to Christianity. That's why, whether you're talking about a school play at Christmas time, a judge putting the Ten Commandments on the wall of his court, or a store employee saying "Merry Christmas" instead of "Happy Holidays," liberals are dedicated to driving reminders of Christianity from polite society.

CONSERVATIVES believe in pursuing policies because they're pragmatic and because they work.
LIBERALS believe in pursuing policies because they're "nice" and make them feel good. Whether the policies they're advocating actually work or not is of secondary importance to them.

CONSERVATIVES believe that the United Nations is a corrupt, anti-American, anti-Semitic talking shop that is largely hostile to American interests and too incompetent to be much of use in areas where it's not.
LIBERALS still have confidence in the UN and don't seem to be overly concerned about signing our country on to international schemes that are slanted against us, or about the fact that nations that are largely hostile to our interests like China, France, and Russia have a veto over any significant action that the UN can take.

CONSERVATIVES believe that marriage is one of the most crucial building blocks of a healthy society, and that anything that weakens the institution has the potential to do enormous harm to our country over the long haul. That's why they believe that marriage should be between a man and a woman.
LIBERALS support homosexual marriage, and appear completely unconcerned about the long-term damage that glibly toying with something as important as marriage could do to our country.

CONSERVATIVES believe that companies should be taxed and regulated, but that the government has to be very cautious about adding new burdens on business. Businesses provide jobs, health care for many Americans, and enormous amounts of tax revenue, all of which could be jeopardized if we go overboard with taxes and regulations, thereby killing the goose that lays the golden eggs.
LIBERALS have seldom seen a tax, regulation, or expense that they would hesitate to impose on businesses, despite the potential for damaging the economy.

CONSERVATIVES have kept an open mind about global warming, but they have seen little hard proof that mankind is responsible for the small, roughly 1 degree global temperature increase over the last century. Saying that it is "scientific consensus" that mankind is causing global warming means little when more than 31,000 American scientists disagree.
LIBERALS want to impose massive regulatory schemes that would increase taxes, cost millions of jobs, and cause fuel prices to skyrocket, even though most environmentalists acknowledge that Kyoto and the carbon credit trading schemes that have been put forth wouldn't make a huge dent in the amount of greenhouse gasses produced by mankind.

CONSERVATIVES believe that encouraging poor people to be dependent on the government is counterproductive. Instead, they believe that by keeping taxes low, the economy strong, and by supporting churches and charities, we can create an environment that allows the poor to help themselves.
LIBERALS believe in keeping poor people as dependent on the government as possible, because people who are reliant on the government for their sustenance tend to vote for the political party that will give them the biggest handout.

CONSERVATIVES may not be happy with how the War in Iraq has gone so far, but they believe that pulling out before the Iraqi government can defend itself from attack would lead to a nightmare scenario that has the potential to produce millions of dead Iraqis, a massive spike in worldwide oil costs, and an increase in terrorism after Al-Qaeda declares victory over the United States.
LIBERALS understand the consequences for pulling out of Iraq too quickly just as well as conservatives, but they would prefer to see America lose the War in Iraq, despite the horrible consequences, because they believe it would benefit them politically.

CONSERVATIVES believe in keeping taxes low because when taxes get high, they stifle economic growth and expansion; because it's hard to justify giving the government more money when it wastes so much now; and because people should get to keep as much of their hard-earned money as possible.
LIBERALS prefer high taxes because it gives them more money that they can fritter away on big government programs and social engineering projects.

CONSERVATIVES believe that the market can better allocate resources than the government, and that usually, when you see problems with the market -- for example, gas shortages or the exploding cost of health care -- government interference with the workings of the market is at the root of it.
LIBERALS have never seen a part of the economy that they wouldn't prefer to socialize and put under government control, despite the fact that anything run by the government tends to be slower, less efficient, and more expensive than anything run by private industry.

CONSERVATIVES believe that America has been and continues to be the greatest force for good in the world today. As a nation, we do more to promote freedom, help those who need it, and stand up for what's right than any other dozen nations combined.
LIBERALS always find a way to blame America first. Nobody, no enemy past, present, or future, will ever top American liberals when it comes to generating anti-American propaganda.

November surprise!

2008-11-25T19:00:00.002-06:00

Haven't had time to post since school started, but now that I have a 2-week break for Thanksgiving I feel the need to catch up on things, including blog posts.

My first semester of medical school has been such a whirlwind and it was really hard being away from home for weeks at a time and only able to spend about an hour per weekend home of quality time. So, to take the stress off, I decided to take advantage of the opportunity U of I has to "decompress", meaning I can split my first year into two and halving my courseload. I still have 6 courses I'm taking, but it's better than the 14 I had before!

So, I guess this year is my M1 year and next year would be M1.5. After that, everything proceeds normally with M2-4. So this year I'm taking Anatomy, Anatomy lab, Micro/Immuno, Micro/Immuno Lab, Histo, Histo Lab, Statistics, Intro to Human Disease, and RMED. Technically, the labs are components of the whole class, but they have their own skills exams we have to pass in order to pass the course overall that are unique to the labs themselves. So that leaves Biochemistry, Embryology, Genetics, Physiology, Neuroscience, RMED and Behavioral Science for next year. I'm sure I'll blog more about it later. But for the mean time, my stress level is low and my exam scores are high and I think decompressing was the best decision of my career so far :)

Outside of med school, Joe and I are celebrating our 3rd anniversary tomorrow. We had a rocky patch a year ago, but the counseling has worked and we've been able to weather the times apart pretty well. Thanksgiving is the day after tomorrow and this year we'll be at Sue's house in St. Charles.

I still have my finals for Micro/Immuno and IHD classes 12/15 and 12/19.

First day of school...

2008-08-25T20:00:00.000-05:00

And I miss my husband. But really, I'm too tired to worry about it. I have to go eat dinner then get cracking on my Anatomy and prepare for tomorrow's lectures. Ugh.

All moved in!!!

2008-08-17T22:01:00.000-05:00

Everything is finally moved in and has a place in my new room. I'm spending time with my new roommates shopping and watching the olympics. My wonderful husband helped me move everything in and put my sofa bed together. what a pain!

At any rate, we got it together (offer crappy directions). Tomorrow I need to finish some last-minute shopping and head to the university to get my ID and browse the bookstore for things I will need for classes. whew!

Meg is off to School

2008-08-17T08:29:00.001-05:00

Today is the Big Day. We move Meg down to U of I to start her adventure of becoming a Doctor.

I'll miss her, but I'm sure the Four years will fly by, right?

New Author...

2008-08-16T21:30:00.002-05:00

Waiting for Joe to set up his permission to be my co-author :P

Happy Birthday!

2008-08-09T11:37:00.002-05:00

Happy Birthday to my husband today!!!! :) He's 39 years young now but this morning he claimed he felt like he was 29 LOL! We went out for dinner last night at Walter Payton's Roundhouse with some friends and it was such a great time. Good food, good beer, good company! My favorite is the Summer Dirty Blond Chocolate Ale (or something like that) they offer right now. It's a light beer with a hint of chocolate and somehow they pull it off so it's still a good beer and not tainted by the chocolate flavor (like some fruity beers are). Another couple we are good friends with were having their 20 year HS reunion at the roundhouse so we snuck in there and had a fun time with them too.

Today my mom's best friend and her husband are coming for lunch with my husband and I and then later Joe is getting a last-minute birthday gift from me - a tattoo to cover up one on his upper left shoulder that has faded and barely there. He decided on an Eagle with an American flag, but in the old-school Sailor Jerry style. I bought a motorcycle trailer at the beginning of summer for him to be considered a birthday/xmas thing but I'm a softie sometimes ;).

Sometime today I've got to get my workout in. I've been doing pretty good I think - the inches are coming off (haven't stepped on the scale in a while) and clothes that were too tight are fitting well now - some are even getting too loose. My body is also getting tighter and I just feel better. All nice signs and encouraging. I can also feel myself getting stronger. Pull ups are getting easier and sit ups are not as much of a chore as they used to be! Burpees will always suck though ;).

Tick tock tick tock...

2008-08-07T22:00:00.002-05:00

Being in limbo is kind of strange. I wish I had opted for a real vacation rather than stay at home and work. At least I'm getting some things accomplished, albeit slowly!

I started work on a blouse today and realized I don't have enough fabric. So tomorrow I have to go to Jo Ann's and get some more black knit. And, I figured out a rotary cutting blade is essential for time-saving so that's also high on my list! I'm anxious to get it done, but I also have the following tasks to try to accomplish in the next week on my list:

Organize Magazines
Organize loose files in office
Clean windows/screens
Sort through crap in basement
Clean out office
Sort Wedding Photos
Billing: CBO/Insurance
Clean out freezers
Paint house trim and back garage
Plant around house/back garage

Yeah, I'm my own bitch for a while. I don't expect to get this all done in the next week, but at least half and work at it until it's done (hopefully by Fall). And then, the masochist I am, I'll re-up the list with more stuff to-do.

Fun, fun.

Hanging up the old speech therapy jacket...... for now

2008-07-31T22:01:00.003-05:00

Today was my last day of work, although I'm squeezing in one more client tomorrow morning because of last-minute scheduling difficulties. I was a bit sad this week to see my favorite clients go. It was nice to get pictures and hugs and kisses though. These are the moments I just love kids! I don't know if it's enough to push me into pediatrics, which seems to be the specialty people assume I'm headed for LOL.

I have to admit, I felt pretty relieved after my last client today, knowing that I have the next 2 weeks to myself, my house, and my husband. I plan on tying up the loose ends with work - discharge reports and final billing, but mostly sleeping in, cleaning out my office, and trying to work on my sewing skills. And then in the yard with Joe when I can. I kind of wish I had given myself 3 or 4 weeks off instead of 2, but maybe if I push myself I can get out of procrastination mode when I'm off.

Two weeks from Sunday (8/17) is when I plan on moving into my room I rented at the house in Urbana. It's soooo nice that my housemates already have everything established - all I need is stuff for my room. I'm really happy with my choice in living arrangements so far. One of my housemates, Jen, was really great in showing me around campus and giving me the inside tour of the medical school building when I went down to sign my lease. I think I already wrote about that, but it was really nice.

Went to the Jimmy Buffett show this past weekend in Bridgeview. It was fun. I can't believe I didn't drink at all, but I was the DD and judging from the party, someone needed to stay sober! i got a little ticked during the show when I went to the bathroom and saw my husband in the crowd getting a beer and totally looking at some girl's ass. Then a friend said he was being pretty friendly with girls he saw in the port-a-potty line during tailgaiting. I was initially really angry, but looking back, 99% of the girls there were wearing next to nothing, my husband was drunk, and all the guys in our group were ogling (including my dad). Whatever. I know I reacted the way I did because of Joe's indiscretion back in October, but I think this time, he was being typical. I think he knows now that it's going to take a while before I accept anything as "normal" though, and he did apologize and we talked about some of these issues at length. And, case closed - for now.

So Joe's birthday is next weekend (8/9). I already bought him a motorcycle trailer so probably we're just going to go out to dinner. I don't know if my family got him anything yet - I may have to remind them or something. I'm sure his family will call the night before to get together, as usual. Very last minute people. Oh, now that I remember, Jim (Joe's brother) has a birthday coming up too. Crap. I have to go shopping for something now.

Anyway, I guess after 11am tomorrow I will officially be "off the clock". I think I'll begin working on a blouse pattern I bought and see how it turns out. And maybe fool around with my new Tablet PC I got (which is super awesome, btw!). I also have friends I need to catch up on sometime in the next week! But not during Project Runway!

Kathy, Abha, I swear to G-d that I haven't forgot about you guys. I'm just freaking tired and looking forward to some piece of mind. I misplaced my sanity and can't find it. Maybe it's in the freezer....

Tick tock...

2008-07-21T21:06:00.001-05:00

So the summer is winding down and all the MS-1 - to - be's I know are getting ready for the start of school next month. We've slowly been fed information about the first week (aka orientation) and our semester schedule is already posted for our amusement.

I finally signed my lease for my room in a house with an MD/PhD and a Physics postdoc. Hooray for studious roommates!!!!!!

Orientation starts 8/19 and the clock is ticking down (29 more days and counting!). Next week is my last week of work and then I'm off from 8/1 to 8/17 to get some things done around the house and do my school shopping. Planning on moving in 8/17 and since I'll be home on the weekends, I don't need much stuff. A place to sleep (futon), a desk (table), my new tablet PC (woo hoo!!!), some end tables, lamps, and clothes.

The best part to look forward to is the cupcake shop not far from where I live :)!

Behind home plate....

2008-07-19T09:14:00.003-05:00

My brother is a lucky bastard sometimes. Sent me a text pic of a view of Busch Stadium from a luxury box suite behind home plate.

July Info Packet...

2008-07-11T01:42:00.002-05:00

Finally got some more info on the upcoming M1 orientation in Urbana. Looks like it's a fun-filled week of HIPAA and universal precautions lectures, Id pictures, lab orientations, financial aid information, and course overviews and requirements. At least they're feeding us during the day :)!

I'm going down to Champaign this weekend to sign my lease and check out the area again around the house I'll be living in. I know the bus stop is right on the corner, maybe about 30 feet away, and my roommates tell me the med building is a 20 minute bike ride. I got a sweet new Schwinn from WalMart and I'm all ready to get some use out of that baby. Plus, it totally looks like Pee-Wee's bike. That just cracks me up. Anyway, all my classes and labs are in the same building, which is nice. I remember my freshman days on campus wandering around looking for all the different buildings. Thank goodness I can keep the deer in the headlights look to a minimum!

As for work, only 3 more weeks until I can call it quits, and I guess 39 days until Orientation starts. I used to think time was moving so slow and couldn't wait for school to start, now I'm getting that nervous feeling of "wtf did I get myself into!"

I've been out of the gym this past week too - spending most of my days seeing clients then trying to take it easy. Sunday night I came down with something gastrointestinal and everything I eat is still going right through me (trying to say that as delicately as possible). At first I thought it was food poisoning, but now I think it's some sort of bacteria or virus. I'm going to give it until Sunday (a week) and if I'm still not better try to get in to see the doctor next week. I did switch thyroid medicine brands from synthroid to levothyroxine, but I did that last week, so I don't think that's really the culprit. Otherwise, I'm subsisting on nutritional shakes, popsicles, and ice cream. I tried to eat some Ramen noodles tonight and they came right back up as soon as I ate them. Apparently solid foods are a no-no right now! It sucks because I have an appetite, just the rest of me won't behave.

Gosh, it's 2am! Being sick also throws off my sleep schedule....

In Memory Of.....

2008-07-08T12:41:00.001-05:00

Brent Roever, 1976-2008

Brent Roever
Brent Roever Brent Michael Roever, 32, of Waterloo, Ill., born May 10, 1976, in Red Bud, Ill., died Friday, July 4, 2008, in St. Louis, Mo. Mr. Roever belonged to Laborers Local 196, Monroe County Democratic Club, Immaculate Conception Church in Madonnaville, Ill. Brent was an avid hunter, a NASCAR enthusiast and a Cardinals fan. He was preceded in death by his maternal grandmother, Delores M., nee Bertram, Schreder; paternal grandparents, Wesley and Mary, nee Wuertz, Roever; and aunt, Barbara Roever. Surviving are his parents, Ronald and Kathy, nee Schreder, Roever; his sisters and brother, Michelle Roever, Anne Roever and Jared Roever; and his grandfather, Michael Schreder of Waterloo, Ill. Memorials may be made in the form of Masses or to the family wishes. www.quernheimfuneralhome.com Visitation: Friends may call from 3 to 9 p.m. Monday, July 7, 2008, from 3 to 8 p.m. Tuesday, July 8, 2008, and from 8 to 9:15 a.m. Wednesday, July 9, 2008, at Quernheim Funeral Home in Waterloo, Ill. Funeral: Funeral Mass will be held at 10 a.m. Wednesday, July 9, 2008, at Immaculate Conception Catholic Church in Madonnaville, Ill., with Fr. Thomas Stout officiating. Interment will be in Immaculate Conception Cemetery in Madonnaville, Ill.

Leno Headlines...

2008-06-24T19:51:00.003-05:00

RMED Orientation....

2008-06-08T14:21:00.001-05:00

This past week we had our orientation to the RMED program. It was kicked off by a picnic at one of the dean's houses on Tuesday evening and the orientation began Wednesday morning. There are a total of 18 RMED students and everyone really hit it off at the Tuesday night picnic mixer. We all have interesting backgrounds and everyone seemed to click with each other. It was really nice to see everyone interact without little clique-y groups forming. Hopefully we stay like that!

Anyway, attending the RMED orientation just solidified what a great decision it was to choose this program over others I was accepted to. Everything was just so personal and they made it clear that everyone in the program was picked for a reason. We had some really great speakers tell us about the different facets to being a rural doc from personal experiences from physicians to state financing by an IDPH person. We also had some students who just finished their M1 year dish on their experiences, and it sounds hard, but fun.

Some of the interesting points of the RMED program include monthly meetings at a buffet-style restaurant (read FREE MEALS!!!) with guest speakers, field trips with different rural agendas (e.g. hospital touring, farm medicine workshops, etc.), and a 16-week rural preceptorship that requires quite a bit of autonomy from the student.

The emphasis of the program is definitely FP residency placement, and I'm still on the fence about specialties I like. I know I have lots of time to work that out, but I am even more confident now that I want to return to a rural area to practice, no matter what. That may limit me somewhat in residency specialty in the future, but that's ok. I just really have a strong desire to serve people out in the country, I just don't know how I want to do that yet!

Anyway, we get our next batch of UIC info in July and then our official M1 orientation begins in Urbana on 8/19 and classes commence on 8/25.

My work load is tapering off and I'm going to be giving my notice of termination of business to my referral sources around July 1, with an anticipated termination date of July 31. As much as I enjoy working with the kids, I'm so ready to move on to the next step in life. In the meantime, we've got a mini July 4 vacation trip to Southern Illinois/SE Missouri planned and a trip to Sturgis, SD at the beginning of August. I realize I have to get in my leisure time now because come mid-August the party's over :).

Presenting.... Noah!!!!!!

2008-05-28T16:17:00.004-05:00

NOLA and the Gulf Coast....

2008-05-18T13:55:00.001-05:00

Lately I've been flying low just waiting for August to come around. I'm counting the days until I can quit my job (JULY 31 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) but until then I'm working and trying to relax as much as possible before I embark on years of stress LOL. I'm sure med school has it's good times and bad times, heh heh.

My husband and I took a trip down to New Orleans this past week. I used to live in Mobile, AL and spent a lot of time in NOLA with my then-boyfriend (now ex) working on his PhD at Tulane. I haven't been back since Katrina and my husband has never been to NOLA. We stayed at an old hotel in the French Quarter and roamed most of the city. It looks the same, except driving through the 9th ward you can still see some hurricane damage. Many houses and apartment buildings are being rebuilt, and honestly, there were some neighborhoods I remember being so trashed, it was hard to imagine a hurricane went over it.

We went over to Mobile for a day to see a dear friend I did my doctoral studies with. She's got her PhD in audiology and works for the VA in Mobile. It was a wonderful visit. The next day my husband and I drove over to Gulf Shores and took advantage of the sun (with sunblock!!!) and the warm water on the beach. I really really miss Mobile and the Gulf Coast. I was a little homesick for it when we left back for NOLA.

We got home on Friday after spending Thursday night with my parents (we drove and their house its the 1/2 way point). This coming weekend we'll be going back down to visit my folks at the family lake home in Missouri for some Memorial Day fun.

The months of June and July don't have much planned, save a July 4th party with my family. before my orientation starts Aug. 19th, my husband and I are planning to go to the Sturgis Bike Rally in South Dakota for one last hurrah. We're going to camp somewhere around Deadwood and ride around the Black Hills. I think I'm most excited to see live, free-roaming buffalo

Anyway, this break between the acceptance and matriculation is so far pretty sweet.

Oh, I also received word from the hospital board scholarship committee, and they are excited to work out a scholarship repayment proposal should I return to my hometown. Exciting to know that there are avenues to help with finances!

Poor, poor Michael Moore....

2008-04-21T18:12:00.003-05:00

I've always thought Michael Moore was a self-serving idiot. Now it's time for the rest of the public to realize this too.

www.moorewatch.com posted this blog entry today that made me want to cheer:

Michael Moore has endorsed Obama . This should be the death knell for the Obama campaign, since not a single candidate for political office endorsed by Michael Moore has ever won. The endorsement is aboout what you’d expect, the usual nonsensical ramblings of a multimillionaire socialist. Read it yourself if you like, I just want to make a couple of observations.

"I don’t get to vote for President this primary season. I live in Michigan."

No you don’t, Michael, you live in a penthouse in Manhattan. Jim and I know your home address. You own property in a swanky part of Michigan. (You know, where you held your film festival, rather than in Flint, the town you claim to come from but don’t. Why help out the disadvantaged in Flint when you can suck up to the rest of the millionaire liberals who own gigantic private estates?) So, either you’re registered to vote in two places (New York and Michigan) or you’re lying your ass off to perpetuate the farcical image of yourself as an average Joe. Both of these sound equally plausible.

"I, like the majority of Americans, have been pummeled senseless for 8 long years."

And here we see the classic liberal self-image as a pathetic waif being beaten by an all-powerful machine. This is one of the things I find more vulgar and disgusting about liberalism than anything else, their incessant need to view themselves as victims. I guess this is why they believe that the government is the solution to ever conceivable problem. If people weren’t pathetic victims they might be able to find solutions to some of their own problems, and if that were to happen (God forbid!) it would deny liberals the ability to derive self-satisfaction from pointing to a government program and saying, “See what a wonderful person I am? I supported that proposal!”

"It’s foolish to see the Democrats as anything but a nicer version of a party that exists to do the bidding of the corporate elite in this country."

Thus says a guy who has made himself filthy, stinking rich by working with massive corporations. But let’s not let a little rank hypocrisy get in the way of your own perceived sense of victimhood, huh Mike? Just keep dressing like a slob and wearing your baseball caps, the world is full of idiots who will actually buy your little persona.

Hooray for people who expose this idiot for what he is!

Financial Aid....

2008-04-13T14:09:00.003-05:00

Got my FA award details and Estimated COA... yup medical school is a LOT of money.

Here's the breakdown, pretty much what everyone else got:

2008-2009 Academic Year:
Tuition: $26,722
Mandatory Fees: 2,488
Facilities Assessment: 540
Books and Supplies: 1, 380
Housing and Food Expense: 11, 339
Transportation: 1,512
Loan Fees: 608
Personal Expenses: 2,268
Disability Insurance: 64

Total: $46,921

Ouch. I'm glad I went to a state school.

I'm currently working on scholarships, etc., and will post more about this soon.

First Info Packet!!!!

2008-04-13T13:53:00.003-05:00

Wow! Med school is really going to happen! It has seemed like such a dream so far out of reach but I'm slowly waking out of my slumber as it becomes more and more real. That sounds so corny, but really it's the best way to describe how I feel about doing this. It's like everything was so far away. Even taking the MCAT and applying to schools was done 1.5 years before I would even begin classes!

I have since decided to matriculate at UIC. It's just better all around for my family and career goals. UIC is a well-respected medical school and a few of the physicians I look up to are alumni.

My first dose of reality came with my acceptances, but I got another dose with the first information packet from UIC with upcoming important dates and a brief outline of curriculum.

So far, here's what's in store:

June 3/4: RMED orientation. Picnic on June 3 and Orientation day June 4 at the UIC-R campus.
August 19-22: C-U campus orientation (nothing specific on this yet)
August 25: Classes begin!
Sept 19 and 22: First set of exams.

We have more dates for our yearly exams, but I don't need to post those now. Our Fall, 2008 semester looks like this:

21 Credit hours:

Anatomy 1 - 3 hours
Biochemistry - 3 hours
Histology 1 - 2 hours
Immunology/Microbiology 1 - 3 hours
Intro to Human Disease 1 - 1 hours
Physiology 1 - 3 hours
Embryology 1 - 2 hours
Genetics - 2 hours
Medical Statistics - 2 hours

There will also be a clinical preceptorship we'll do where we're matched with a physician to shadow and learn more about clinical stuff (order of exam, SOAP notes, etc.) but we don't have any specific info on that yet. In addition, RMED students will have other activities to do for the RMED program.

More to come when I get further details!

A Steel Magnolia....

2008-04-13T13:41:00.002-05:00

I'm currently reading Condi: The Life of a Steel Magnolia by Mary Beth Brown.

I have to say that I am utterly in awe of this woman. I have always considered her a strong woman that will go down in history as such, but after learning so much more about her, she is now, and will always be a personal heroine of mine.

Her life has been filled with adversity for reasons beyond her control (i.e. skin color) but she AND her family, from generation to generation, has handled her challenges with grace and without complaint. We should all be so lucky to have a family like hers and to accomplish what they've all done.

Well done, Condi. Well done. I hope to meet you one day and shake your hand. Or be your doctor LOL.

Quick Update...

2008-04-04T07:53:00.002-05:00

I think I made my final decision on which med school to attend.......... UIC.

Internet time warp....

2008-03-30T11:59:00.003-05:00

Have you ever sat down in front of your computer and thought, "I just need to check my e-mail and then get on with what I have planned" only to find three hours have passed in what seems like 15 minutes? Just happened to me this morning. Hopped on the computer around 9am, just looked at the clock and it's almost noon!

I was supposed to be working on my billing but being the procrastinator I am, I'm going to do some tonight and finish on Tuesday or Wednesday this week. Hey, I got my taxes done at least and sent off to my accountant! And more than one week before tax day, too! Huge for me! I've always been a big procrastinator, but I think it's because I work better under pressure. I've never missed deadlines, etc. but I also never work at a leisurely pace either. This is going to have to change in August though, where if I want to stay ahead or even with the med school pack, I need to do my work. Strangely, during my pre-reqs, I didn't procrastinate very much. I think it's because I knew my grasp on the fundamentals would suffer if I didn't follow through every day with study. So maybe I'm more of a selective procrastinator :)!

My husband considers me the antithesis of a spontaneous spender, so I shocked the hell out of him when I came home with an expensive new iRobot Roomba for the house. After deliberating over it last night, I decided I'm going to return it today. It was a compulsive buy, something I rarely do, but still, we need the money more than a robotic vacuum right now. Shame, because some friends of ours have one and they love it. I'm sure it would have worked nicely here too, and been fun to watch terrorize the cats, but still, we could pay our whole month's utilities for what it costs. Oh well.

On a completely different note, the SIU committee apparently met last Tuesday (3/25) to dole out official acceptances. I called Friday and my status hadn't changed in the system, but the nice lady on the other side of the line said that the letters were going out that day and the system hadn't been updated yet. I would like to believe her, but from my experience with medical school admissions depts, they pay a lot of lip service to save face. Anyway, one person on SDN already claimed to have received an acceptance, but looking at previous posts of theirs, it's not clear if it's an AWPA letter or official acceptance letter. At any rate, I'm keeping a watchful eye on the mailbox, all but stalking our poor mail lady waiting to see if I get the coveted acceptance letter.

So what's the big deal, some might think.... Well, having been accepted to UIUC/Rockford med track through UICOM, I really need to figure out where I'm going to go in order to secure housing and such. Housing being the important factor. My friends and family keep telling me that I should go to UICOM because of the benefit of being able to commute from years 2-4. I agree, but I still have this bit of nostalgia for SIU. I love their curriculum, they have a great match list, SIU is my alma mater (x 2), and SIU-SOM is my mom's alma mater. I know there's nothing I can do about my situation at present, except officially withdraw from SIU and just choose UIC. Ugh, why can't I just have a magic genie to help with this???

LOL

2008-03-02T10:53:00.002-06:00

Watch This Space....

2008-02-23T11:52:00.002-06:00

Big announcement once I receive my official acceptance letter...

Aaaaannnnd........... I got accepted to U of I!!!!! I got a note in the mail today from the RMED program congratulating me on my acceptance! I also have the "good" status change message on the U of I database system when I check my status :). Can't wait to get the packet and get this train rolling!

Still waiting for SIU.... the next batch of acceptances go out March 31. I will probably be bummed if I don't get one this go-around, or if I don't get in at all. But the RMED program was a CLOSE second, so I really won't feel THAT bad, except that it's my alma mater and could have been a family tradition. Oh well.

The RMED program is split like SIU's program - first year is in Urbana, last 3 in Rockford. The Rockford part is kind of nice because I can commute. We have even kicked the idea around about moving closer if that's where I end up because Joe works out of St. Charles, well his company's office is there and he works in that area a lot.

I was kind of looking forward to CCOM, too. Seems like nice people and a good school all around, but the tuition is the serious deciding factor. Really.

At any rate. Wooo hooooooo!!!!!!!!!!

10 All Natural Ways to Stop Feeling Depressed...

2008-02-13T08:20:00.006-06:00

After feeling down about the continued wait through SIU, I thought I would post something to lift my spirits, and maybe yours.

10 All Natural Ways to Stop Feeling Depressed.... Syncope82 is an idiot
September 20th, 2007 by John Wesley

* Life is a drag.
* What’s the point of anything?
* I’ll never be happy.

Do any of these gloomy thoughts sound familiar? It’s likely they do. The occasional case of the blues is perfectly normal, but that doesn’t make dealing with it any easier. If you allow them to, negative thoughts can fester and lead to serious depression. That’s why it’s important to take action early to bust yourself out of a slump.

While these suggestions won’t eliminate your problems, they can help you break a negative thought pattern and stop feeling depressed. If you think you might have a serious mental health problem, don’t hesitate to see a medical professional.

1. Understand the emotional cycle - Life is an emotional roller coaster. Some days you feel like nothing can stop you. Other days you feel utterly hopeless. Most of the time you’re somewhere in between. Understanding the pattern of positive and negative emotions will help you put your feelings in perspective. Next time you feel down, just remember that it’s a natural emotion that will inevitably pass. Knowing that a feeling of depression is only temporary makes it less dreadful.

2. Spend time with positive people - Nothing affects the way you think and feel more than the people you interact with. Thoughts (both positive and negative) are contagious. If you are surrounded by negative people, it’s only natural that you’ll start to think and feel the same way. To improve your outlook on life, spend time with positive people. Search them out and try to understand the way they see the world. Chances are their happiness will rub off.

3. Reflect on past success - In the wake of a colossal failure, it’s easy to forget everything you’ve ever done right. Take a few minutes to remember your past accomplishments and build yourself up. What made you successful before? What are your strengths? Frequently, this exercise will build self confidence, help you figure out what went wrong, and generate ideas for success in the future.

4. Focus on gratitude - It’s human nature to measure ourselves against those ahead of us on the social ladder. Studies have shown that people care more about being richer than their friends than actually making more money. When you consider everything good in your life and compare it to the problems of less fortunate people, the issue that’s making you depressed won’t seem as serious.

5. Change of scenery - One of the best ways to change the way you feel is to change your environment. When you get in a slump, you start to associate your problems with everything around you. It can get to the point where your environment is a constant reminder of your problems. This can be a dangerous cycle. The solution is to change things. Change doesn’t have to be radical. Cleaning up, adding more lights, or including pleasant decorations can completely change the mood of a room.

6. Break your routine - Going through the same routine, day after day, can be monotonous and depressing. It often leads to getting caught in a rut. To get out of it you need to temporarily change your routine. If you can, take a day off from work. Do something you don’t normally have time for or something you’ve never tried. In the long run, taking a day off every now and then to get out of slump will make you happier and more productive.

7. Interact with animals and nature - It’s funny when you consider how humans put so much importance on their own tiny problems. Animals don’t think this way. A little bird doesn’t mope around because it isn’t an eagle or because another bird beat it to a tasty seed. Animals live in the present moment and they show love unconditionally. Observing and interacting with them will help you get over your problems.

8. Get moving - As Johnny Cash famously suggested, “Get a rhythm, when you get the blues.” Moving to a beat makes everyone feel better. The same is true for movement in general. Hitting the gym or going for a walk will help you shed the lethargy that comes with feeling depressed. The more enthusiastic your moments, the better you will start to feel.

9. Think about the big picture - As Carl Sagan made evident with the Pale Blue Dot, we’re insignificant creatures living in a vast universe on a tiny planet. In the long run, everything we do will probably be forgotten. Some might find this depressing, but it shouldn’t be. It means that all our problems are illusory. In a million years no javascript:void(0)
Publish Postone will remember what you did or didn’t do. What matters is the present moment and enjoying every second of life that we’re blessed with.

10. Do something to help yourself - Above all, the best way to stop feeling depressed is to take action. What is your biggest problem? How can you alleviate it? Once you decide to stop moping and start moving forward you won’t have time to feel depressed. Action will occupy your mind and give you something to look forward to. Once you get some results, you’ll build momentum and positive thinking will keep getting easier.

Still in limbo....

2008-02-12T12:08:00.000-06:00

Called SIU today and I still am on the AWPA list so I didn't get an official acceptance this go around. The committee meets again in March for the next batch so I'll have to wait until then. Boo.

Oh well. At least it's an update.

Footloose...

2008-02-03T22:25:00.000-06:00

Yacht Rock #11

Frozen Grand Central

2008-02-03T22:21:00.001-06:00

Check this out....

RMED interview part II.......

2008-01-18T18:47:00.000-06:00

High Alternate.

Got the call a little while ago and I was placed on the alternate list but I was told I was high up on the alternate list. I guess I thought wrong about the admission/rejection process! At any rate the program director was very nice and indicated that based on previous years, my odds of acceptance are very good. He said he did have to make some rejection calls - what a hard job to do.

So, I may hear back next week, next month, or May, when the huge waitlist movement happens. I'm trying to stay positive and I realize a high alternate ranking is not so bad, but it's still a bit of a blow to my ego ;).

I'm also hoping for a full SIU acceptance when their adcom meets next (sometime in the next few weeks) and I know I still have my spot at CCOM, another great school. I think the hardest part about applying to medical school are all the hoops you have to jump through, and all the waiting you have to do. Ugh. But, as my mother just told me, it will all work out in the end!

RMED interview part I..........

2008-01-18T12:06:00.000-06:00

So, I finally had my interview for the Rural Med (RMED) medical school program through the University of Illinois School of Medicine yesterday.

U of I has one of, if not the biggest medical schools in the country, and is split between 4 campuses: Champaign/Urbana, Chicago, Peoria, and Rockford. The Rockford campus houses the RMED program and it's a rather new (1990's-era) initiative to train physicians to return to primary care positions in rural and underserved areas of Illinois. There are 15-20 students in the RMED program and about 50 total that attend the Rockford campus for classes. The first year is in C/U and the last 3 in Rockford.

Anyway, back to the interview! I arrived at the Rockford campus (which is actually quite small - one large building I believe) and the program director was waiting in the lobby to meet me. Several M-2 students and one M-4 were available to answer questions and give tours. My interview time was 9:30a to 10a. It is a panel interview in front of about 15 physicians from different rural communities all over Illinois. Even though I knew about the panel beforehand, it was still a little intimidating to walk in and have all eyes on me! Plus, I blush at the drop of a hat, and wore a bit of an open-collar dress shirt, so I was red for about the first 15 minutes of the interview, regardless of the hardness/easiness of the question! The questions were really more about my life and experiences and them asking questions to get a feel for how well I would fit into their program. I only had a couple of pseudo-academic questions: How would you relieve stress in this rigorous academic situation, and how did you prepare for the rigors of a medical school program? Everything else centered around my current career, my experiences growing up in a rural community, and my experiences with parents as a physician and CRNA practicing in a rural community. I answered everything as honestly as I could rather than tell them what they want to hear, although much of what I said jives with what they were looking for, I think.

The only thing I can think back on that I wish I handled differently was when they asked about specialty interests. One asked since I was so interested in Neuro in my PhD program, would I be drawn to that field rather than primary care? My response was that I've had the opportunity to shadow a lot of different specialties since starting the application process, and I really enjoy medicine in a lot of different areas. I'm interested by Surgery, by FP, by anesthesia, by psych, and so on. I also went on to explain that I have faith in the 3rd and 4th years of medical school to help whittle down my interests, and that more than anything, I want to provide services in a rural area. I mentioned that my speech therapy practice now is rural, and I really enjoy the interaction with the people I see and continuity in their care. Hopefully I didn't put my foot in my mouth too much answering that question. But you can see what I mean by answering honestly rather than saying "Oh FP is for me, no doubt!"

After the interview was over, I had the chance to talk with a few other interviewees and then I was free to go around 11:30. It snowed like crazy so it took a while to get home. Typical travel time to Rockford is about 1:15 but that day it was more like 1:45 because of the snow, and for some reason I ended up taking the long way to the school.

Anyway, the committee ends their interviews today and will meet this afternoon to discuss who's in and who's out. There is no quota and they could theoretically take all the interviewees or none. Once you've been invited for interview, it's just a matter of the committee feeling you are a fit with the program or not. Once they decide, the program director will let us know THIS EVENING!!!!!!!!! It's a fast process!!!!!!!!!!!!

So.... there will be an update to the RMED interview in the form of part II later tonight! Here's hoping for the best, but in the event I don't make it, at least I made it to the interview process, which was a few people out of hundreds of applicants and a great experience overall.

New Filling...

2008-01-12T20:05:00.001-06:00

Went to the dentist today and had a filling replaced. Ouch. I am one of those weird people who metabolize pain medication quickly and the dentist had to keep injecting me with novocaine (or similar) during the drilling because my root was extremely sensitive. Had it done around 2:15 today and all the numbness was gone by 6pm. Crazy.

Nothing much going on around here lately. SIU is playing tonight, but it ups my blood pressure so much that I refuse to watch/listen until their shooting percentage improves. They won the last game, but prior to that at ISU (Bloomington/Normal), they went 10 MINUTES in the first half only scoring 3 points. Absolutely ridiculous. Anyway, I still support my Dawgs, but it's better for my health and the TV if I just wait for the line score and keep up with the SalukiTalk BB.

I have my RMED interview this coming week on Thursday - getting excited for that! I'm really leaning toward SIU, but being on the AWPA list is not a guarantee until the adcom meets again to dole out the "official" acceptances. The AWPA is the "unofficial" acceptance. So, I'm not putting all my eggs in one basket. I am still holding my CCOM acceptance as well just in case. Those 3 are my top choices and have been all along, so we'll see how it pans out. I would love to be a Saluki again, but it's up to the admissions committee! And who knows, I may fall in love with the RMED program.

That's all for now. Been blogging on my fitness blog lately.

Happy Birthday!

2008-01-08T17:06:00.001-06:00

Today is Elvis' birthday and my mom's!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My mom is 39 again. And getting some goodies from N'awlins!

Even better - I'm on the last leg of whatever virus I had. Still have icky stuff in my sinuses but feeling better. Sleeping like a log, too!

Happy New Year!!!!!!!

2008-01-01T10:57:00.000-06:00

It's gonna be great in 2008!!!!!!

Well, as long as we can keep Obama and Hillary out of office.

Anyway, for your viewing pleasure.........

I just want to say....

2007-12-27T16:32:00.000-06:00

That having strep throat and every other possible viral/bacterial respiratory and sinus infection possible over the Christmas holidays makes for a less-than-stellar time. My voice is finally back, but shaky, and I sound like the Christmas goose we ate on Tuesday.

Oh, and the 10-15 pounds I lost between Christmas and Thanksgiving are back. And they brought friends. Oh well. It's all part of "the resolve" anyway starting next week.

That is all.

Christmas 2007

2007-12-25T21:46:00.000-06:00

Christmas was a little bit bland this year. Well, maybe anticlimactic would be a more appropriate summary. The most exiting moments of the month came last week with my SIU AWPA notification, which kind of overshadowed the excitement of celebrating Christmas.

We spent Christmas Eve with Joe's family and it was a lot of fun. Not much else to say except we ate, laughed, ate, laughed, lather, rinse, repeat. Today, Christmas Day, we went to my aunt's house to see Grandma and another aunt visiting from out of town. It was a nice visit, but I always leave her place with this feeling of inadequacy, which I know comes from her constant nitpicking at me from as far back as my childhood. Anyway, with the news of getting into med school came the nitpicking I expected. What really bothered me most was the way she laughed at Joe and I when we told her we decided to get tattoos for Christmas. Our presents to each other in the form of tattoos came about rather unorthodoxically as Joe tried to get our huge poster-sized wedding photo framed with no luck. He knew I wanted a small tattoo next year so in order not to leave me empty-handed, he got me a small gift-certificate to use later on. Just after Thanksgiving, Joe found a great artist in Aurora and a great tattoo, and I told him that could be his Christmas present - no big deal.

So back to today. I'm not embarrassed in the least about our Christmas presents this year but it was just extremely rude that my own family member would go out of their way to poke fun at our expense and then try to recruit my grandma and my other aunt into how "silly" that sounds. She's already an incredibly judgmental person, and I can just picture her on the phone to my other relatives after we left, telling them all about it. In addition to the tattoo gifts, that were so obviously beneath her, she put in her usual jabs at my mother, indicating that (while I know my father visited my grandmother on a solo trip over the summer and the fact that he was going to do so again this Thursday), "it couldn't possibly be the truth because my mother doesn't let my father drive alone." I have no idea where she conjured this idea, except judging from the tone of her voice and Joe's agreement in how I understood it to be, she was taking a dig at my mother. It never fails.

I realize that she is family, and I try my best to be gracious in her home, but I just get tired of having to be the outlet for all of her frustrations and feelings of inadequacy she obviously has toward my mother. There appears to be a lot of gossiping in this family and I grow weary of being the punching bag. It's easy for my parents to tell me to visit because my grandmother lives there now, but my father has no idea of the malevolence I endure when I'm there. Only in the past few years has my mother picked up on what I endure. And while she supports me in private, she can be manipulative in letting my aunt pick at me to avoid being picked on herself. So I've done what most normal people do - avoid the toxic behavior, except sometimes you can't avoid it, such as times like this, and it drives me crazy to do my "duty".

As an aside to the personal digs and conceited attitude, is the fact that I have nothing tangible to remember my grandmother by, yet my aunt's house is decorated in grandma's old furniture, knick-knacks, and collectibles. Grandma's old pictures adorn my aunt's walls and things I used to think were special about Grandma's house are now all over my aunt's house. I understand that Grandma now lives with my aunt because she's unable to take care of herself, but she made a big production about giving her things away when she moved "before she died" so seeing them there let me know that my aunt staked her claim and that's her stuff now. I was given a specified box of things to go through a couple of months ago, but it was literally my Grandmother's old bathroom items - used shower curtains, etc., and I'm sorry, but that's not a legacy. I refused to go through that crap and I'm coming to terms with my memories being all I'll have to remember my Grandmother by. I just wish I knew why my aunt feels such entitlement to all these things.

Most of all, I wish I knew how to deal with the obvious feelings I have about her, and I wish my parents would stick up for me now and again.

AWPA list!!!!!

2007-12-20T16:35:00.001-06:00

Made it onto the Accept When Place Available list for SIU!!!!!!!!!!! As long as I'm ranked in the middle or higher on the list, I should get and acceptance!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Four-Eyes and a trip to Rockford in January!

2007-12-18T15:33:00.000-06:00

I decided to go shopping at Walmart today to get the stuff I needed for my cookie-baking frenzy today. I swear I think I contribute my fair share to the economy just by setting foot in that store 4-6 times a week! Anyway, the Vision Center is right on the corner when you walk in and I had the thought that it's been over 6 years since I've had my eyes examined! Over the last year I've been having trouble with night vision - I see things clearly, but there's some sort of blurry "halo" around objects I see and sometimes it's difficult for me to read small signs. I also get this after I exercise or around really bright lights.

So, I wander into the Vision Center and ask about setting up an appointment, come to find they had a free spot right then! Had my eye exam and found that while I still have 20/20 vision, I also still have a slight astigmatism that is causing my blurriness, especially at night. I had Lasik 6 years ago and was told this might happen after a few years because of my astigmatism. So it was recommended I could get a set of glasses for night-driving if I wanted to, otherwise everything else was fine. So I decided to go for it and they'll be ready right after Christmas.

Before my Lasik procedure, my vision was atrocious. It was about 20/500 - meaning that what normal people see at 500 feet, I could see at 20 feet. Lasik was like a gift from God in that my vision was restored. I think it's kinda cool to wear glasses, but I hated wearing them all the time. Now I can wear them whenever. Yay! Also found out I've got no farsightedness yet. I can't remember when my parents started using reading glasses - somewhere around 35-40, maybe later. I'll have to ask. So Merry Christmas to me!

On to the second topic - I received an invitation to interview for a position in the Rural Medicine Program at Rockford through the University of Illinois Medical School. I received a phone call and scheduled for the 3rd week in January. The coordinator had pleasant things to pass on from the admissions committee's selection for my interview - apparently I was high on their list for interview! This is incredibly exciting! U of I is a wonderful program and RMED will train me more in the rural experience of medicine rather than big-city or suburban. I still have no clue what I want to specialize in, but I do know I want to return to a rural community, as does my husband. Knowing the types of physicians that are available in the rural town I live in now, and the one I grew up in, it seems like there are a lot of opportunities available to me, and I'm really excited to get involved in the rural sense. I'm so excited!!!! However, a dilemma may arise if I get accepted to both SIU and U of I RMED. It will be a tough decision because they are both rural-medicine oriented. I will wait for that day to come for now and just relish in the fact that I got an interview!!!!!!! Yay!!!!!!!!!!

Back to baking cookies now......

No More S/R.F. !!!!!!!

2007-12-16T21:30:00.000-06:00

So for the past couple of years I've been driving out to S./R.F. to do therapy, and this is my last week. I actually only have 2 clients to see this week, and they're both in D. and I'm so excited. Then I'm off for a week for Xmas and I've already scheduled clients close to home to replace my long travel days I hated so much! I was going to wait until after 1/1/08 to start but since 12/31 is a Monday, I figured that was close enough.

Now the farthest I'll have to go is DeKalb and that's an easy 30 minutes. How nice to be able to see 8 clients in a day and still be home in time for dinner! No more 12-14 hour days!!!!!!!!!

In other news, my parents got a new puppy - their 3rd dog now. He's really cute though! They already have 2 Border Collies, Baxter and Beau, and now they have a little mutt named Boots. Oh, and two cats - Buddy and Uszy (pronounced oo-shee - it's Polish for "little ears"). It may seem like they have a zoo, but they have a big house and lots of land for the animals to roam on. I can't wait to see Bootsie! I only have a few pics but he looks cute.

Met up with an old friend yesterday for lunch in the city. It was really nice to see him, although I wish it could have been another weekend :) My husband and I were tired as hell from all the running around we've been doing and it really hit us as we were taking the train in. It was like some sort of domestic jet lag - like we just hit a wall and collapsed. We had fun during lunch but were utterly exhausted on the train ride back home. It's not like the trip was demanding in any way, it's just that we've been on the go so much we really needed decompression time - which ended up being today.

Anyway, I was so happy to catch up with my friend. For a while, I thought he just kind of disappeared into the world! I sent him an invitation to my wedding but he was already on to greener pastures and his forwarding address had expired. It's a bit of a lesson to me to make sure to keep in touch with people I'm fond of a little more often! I don't necessarily need to be on the phone with my friends every day, every week, or even every month, but it's important to keep in touch and remind people they are thought of and that they still have a friend out there. I don't have very many buddies like some have - I have a handful of friends I've made along the years that have similar interests and goals. For the most part, the friends I have can pick right up from the last time we were together, no matter how much time has past. My friend I met with yesterday is such a friend. It reminded me of old times - chatting away over pizza, talking about relationships, work, school, etc. Names and places have changed but the conversation was still great and very stimulating. And we were able to laugh and joke like we used to.

I am really thankful for relationships like this I have with my friends. I can count on only two hands the people in my life I'm that open with, and I like it that way. The rest fall under acquaintences.

Now, only one more week until Christmas! With all the sentiments I have for my friends - I probably ought to get a move on and send my Christmas cards! That's the plan for tomorrow I guess.

SIU falters at SLU

2007-12-15T22:39:00.001-06:00

Mercy. We lost to a team that is mediocre at best. Outside shots were horrific and we couldn't make a layup or freethrow to save our life! I watched the game on ESPNU and the refs seemed absolutely horrid.

One post from SalukiTalk sums up the stats:
SLU's guards: 12-for-21 from the field (2-for-7 from 3) 57 percent
Southern's guards: 4-for-28 from the field (3-for-11 from 3) FOURTEEN percent

14% is a disgrace. I'm letting the discussion unfold on SalukiTalk as to opinions on where SIU should go from here.

I'm at a loss. I love my team, but they need discipline. The coaching has come into question as well, but I want to see more of the season unfold before I jump on that bandwagon. But it may not be a far jump....

SIU interview invite part III....

2007-12-05T09:13:00.000-06:00

I had my SIU interview yesterday and I have to say that I think SIU is a hidden gem. The fact that they only take Illinois residents cuts down on the overall number of applications, but the curriculum and caliber of physician they graduate are impressive.

I was the only interviewee of the day, and I started at 10am with a description of the admissions process, the curriculum, and Q/A session with the director of admissions. I then had a financial aid presentation and then a student tour.

Positives about SIU: hands-on interaction with real patients from the first week. Weekly assignments related to clinical outcomes (e.g. H&Ps, SOAP notes, shadowing time, etc.) starting the first week. Faculty mentor assignment. Clinical mentor assignment. Small class size (72). Simulated patients with clinical supervision. Classes in Springfield are all in the same building and connected to the teaching hospital via breezeways (good when it's cold). Excellent match list. USMLE scores above national average. State school = lower tuition. Close to home. PBL curriculum creates free time for students to study at their own pace, learn to collaborate in small groups, and practice diagnostic techniques early on. Pass/fail grading. Remediation available for students who need extra help in a subject. Some students have jobs during years 2-4.

Negatives: First year is in Carbondale, last 3 in Springfield, although this doesn't really bother me. I love Southern Illinois and I can live with my parents the first year to save $$. PBL curriculum can be challenging for those who need structure or are chronic slackers.

I definitely don't have as many negatives as I do positives for SIU, which is good.

After my tour, my first interview was at 1pm. It was an open-file interview with a physician who sits on the admissions committee. He was super nice and asked lots of questions about activities on my AMCAS including work experience, education, volunteer work, hobbies, etc. We spent some time talking about my work experiences overseas. He finished up with questions about my GPA and MCAT prep. He was impressed with my rise in GPA after my illness freshman/sophomore years and was impressed that I was able to pull up my MCAT score 3 points in a short amount of time from my original score. My 26 MCAT was in the 50th percentile and one thing the interviewer commented on about SIU was that for SIU, the MCAT is not a good predictor of performance on the USMLE. They have consistently had students with average or below-average MCATs who perform above the national average on the USMLEs and it seems like it's something SIU is proud of - that they're able to look beyond numbers and produce competent physicians by scoring standards in that regard.

My second interviewer was running late, which I was advised of the day before, and my second interview began around 2:30pm instead of 2pm. This interview was closed-file. He was also super-nice and explained that he asks 3 major questions during his interviews: 1. Tell me about yourself 2. Why do you want to be a physician and attend SIU? 3. What sets you apart from the other applicants?

In the midst of these questions, he was able to extract a lot of information and we got off on a few tangential conversations, esp. about working in New Zealand. It's one of his top 2 destinations so he had lots of questions for me about it. In the end, he pretty much told me that he liked my personality a lot and would recommend me to the adcom on the form they gave him. I thought that was really cool. We shook hands, and my interview day was over.

The drive back home was about 2.5 hours mostly interstate so I put the cruise on and replayed my interviews in my head. I can't think of anything I wish I hadn't said, and I think I said everything I wanted to say. I still have a happy feeling the next day, so I hope that's a positive sign!

The admissions committee meets 12/18/07 for the applicants who interviewed after Thanksgiving and then they will decide who gets rejected, waitlisted, or placed on the "Accept When Place Available" or AWPA list. The AWPA list consists of the candidates chosen for admission, in a ranked order by a score given by the adcom ranging from 1-3. The adcom sends out 3 batches of admissions equaling 72 spots prior to May 15 and those with the highest ranks receive admissions offers first. As applicants decline their acceptances, new offers are sent, going down the AWPA list until 72 accept and confirm their acceptances after May 15. There is a small benefit to applying and being able to interview early (prior to Thanksgiving) but for the rest, the process kind of levels the playing field until the deadline.

So, I'll find out what "list" I'm on before Christmas, and if I make the AWPA list, I'll find out about acceptance as early as late Jan/early Feb. or as late as May 15. I'm hoping sooner rather than later!

So, overall, I was very happy with my day and being able to see the school up close reinforces my number one status for SIU. Go Dawgs!

"He bite me on my vagina!"

2007-12-02T20:20:00.001-06:00

Dawgs win!!!!!!

2007-12-01T18:30:00.000-06:00

34-27 over University of Massachusetts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dawgs host Delaware at home Friday 12/7/07 @ 7pm

Go Southern Go!

Huckabee in '08!!!!

2007-11-27T16:22:00.001-06:00

Classic Phil Hartman....

2007-11-26T23:11:00.000-06:00

unfrozen caveman lawyer

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Acting tips

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Sassy's Sassiest Boys

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Check out this video: Toonces: The TOONCINATOR

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Some of the best of Mike Myers on SNL...

2007-11-26T22:38:00.000-06:00

SNL - Superfans (Da Bears)
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SNL - Sprockets - Mike Myers - He Loves My Caribou

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10 Funniest SNL Commercials

2007-11-17T13:35:00.000-06:00

10. Schmitt's Gay

9. Happy Fun Ball

8. Uncle Jemimah's Mash Liquor

7. Swill Mineral Water

Swill Mineral Water - video powered by Metacafe
6. Royal Deluxe II

5. Attorney Wade Blasingame

4. Bad Idea Jeans

Bad Idea Jeans

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3. Homocil

2. Buh-Weet Sings

1. Hidden Camera Commerical

Hilarious SNL skit with Chris Farley

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Unicorn Kingdom Club

2007-11-17T13:28:00.000-06:00

Check it out guys!

SIU interview invite part III...

2007-11-15T10:40:00.001-06:00

Looks like 12/4/07 is my SIU interview date! Unfortunately I had a falling out with one of my referral sources for work and have decided to stop seeing clients from them effective first of the New Year.

Apparently they took the liberty of scheduling me for speech-language assessments on Tuesdays into the month of December without asking me about my schedule. 12/4 is my SIU interview and 12/11 I have been selected for jury duty. One of the people in their office actually called me just to yell at me at how inconsiderate I was by changing my date to come there and how they had a full schedule of kids for me to see. I was flabbergasted that someone would actually do that, especially when I let their office know MONTHS ago that I'd be on the interview trail, and they've seen me have to reschedule b/c of previous interviews. Not to mention, the date in question is 3 weeks away, and I also gave them several other dates I could come, but not good enough. This blowout happened this morning, and after I called my husband to discuss the situation and we both agreed it was time to give up that part of work. There's plenty of other work for me and I don't need to bend over backwards to be treated like that.

My dilemma now is how do I tell them?! Do I risk being yelled at again if I call, or should I just fax them a letter? Or should I wait until after Thanksgiving when I'll see them in person? *sigh* sooo not what I need right now!

SIU interview invite part II...

2007-11-09T15:41:00.000-06:00

Got the official e-mail today from SIU granting me an interview. I asked for something the first week of December and hopefully there will be consensus on that.

Woo hoo!

Now I get to sit and wait for my interview packet to arrive and give me the details....

New Year's Resolution Idea....

2007-11-06T23:09:00.000-06:00

I've already started thinking about what I'd like to have as a New Year's Resolution for 2008. I was flipping through my Martha Stewart Living magazine this evening and thought "I'd like to make a lot of the recipes in this issue!"

So now I think I might have found a new resolution for the coming year! I love to cook and bake, but with my pre-med schedule I've been relegated to the crock pot and instant meals for about 2-3 years now. I think I'm more interested in her baking recipes than cooking recipes, but I'm the type that when something sounds good, I want to try it for myself.

I'm taking off work the whole week of Thanksgiving to get my office and the house in order, THEN I'll focus on what recipe will be my first!

Primary Application Essay

2007-11-03T11:32:00.000-05:00

As promised, once I got accepted somewhere, I would post my primary application essay. My intent is for others to learn how to write an application essay, not to plagiarize it. So, someday, if I'm sitting on a med school admissions committee, and I see a similar essay, you're out. DON'T COPY!

With that being said.... here it is:

"I was once asked to write about my life’s heroes. I thought of waxing poetical those who are famous and typically acknowledged for their contributions to society, yet I couldn’t help but be compelled to simply recognize my parents as my heroes. From a very young age, they taught me about self-sacrifice, responsibility, and love. Most importantly, they taught me skills I needed to endure my hardships in life and ultimately learn to make the decision to enter the field of medicine for myself.

The first real example of self-sacrifice came from a devastating illness my father had when I was a child. I remember him holding me, a little three-year-old girl, tears streaming down his face from sadness that he would not see me reach kindergarten. Thyroid cancer was diagnosed and found to have spread into and beyond his lymph nodes. His physicians feared the worst. It was a serious condition, yet my father vowed to do what he could for my mother to ensure a better life should he not survive. My mother, a veteran nurse, had aspirations of medical school. My father put enough money aside for her to complete an undergraduate degree and attend medical school if accepted. My mother honored my father by being in the top of her class, and ultimately attending medical school. Joyfully, my father’s cancer went into remission, and he not only saw me leave kindergarten, but walked me down the aisle for my wedding almost two years ago. Today, my ambition for medical school is often met with a resounding “How logical! Your mother is a physician!” Yet many do not realize the adversity I endured and overcame to be where I am today.

While my mother attended medical school, I was in awe of what she could accomplish. I relished family conversations centered on new biologic topics she learned, or new procedures she assisted in performing. My mother learned all things medical with ease and enjoyment, and I found I wanted to follow her footsteps into medicine. Unfortunately, life took a different turn once I entered college. My freshman year began as most would expect. A flurry of new friends, exciting new classes, and a whole new world of living on my own. Yet I got tired easily, had “foggy” moments, and put on weight. At first I chalked it up to the typical transition into college. Late-night studying, information overload, and junk food are usually the typical culprits. Then, one morning, looking in a mirror, I saw it. A monstrous lump sticking out of my neck. An imaging scan confirmed a solid mass, and subsequent biopsy determined it was thyroid cancer. Flashbacks of my father’s cancer invoked a mix of fear and worry.

My tumor was larger than my father’s had been, but there were minimal signs of metastasis. I endured two years of steady treatment of either no thyroid medication or radiation. My academic performance suffered, I was tired, my hair thinned, and I could hardly concentrate. I was determined to remain in school, but I realized a pre-medical curriculum would be extremely draining on me. In addition, I became wary that I was pursuing medicine out of respect for my mother, so I studied the allied health field of speech-language pathology (SLP) to remain close to the medical field. My aptitude for the profession was astounding, my grades quickly bounced back and my health improved. Later, I completed a graduate program in speech-language pathology and my cancer was permanently at bay.

My first position as an SLP was in New Zealand as I desperately wanted to travel. I found a temporary position that allowed me to complete the standard “internship year” required for SLP accreditation and to encounter new experiences. Though it was only a six-month position, I was privileged to be exposed to a different form of health-care delivery and learn about the many different subcultures and attitudes toward medicine that exist in New Zealand. After returning to the United States, I found myself educationally wanting more. I was accepted into a doctoral program and conducted research, resulting in two publications, and taught an upper-level speech science course. Interestingly, I found myself attracted to the medical aspects of speech and language, frequently consulting with neurologists and observing functional MRI studies for active sites in the brain and designing independent studies researching event-related potentials related to speech and language. My interests expanded into other physiologic aspects related to speech and language before a kind neurologist became curious why I wasn’t pursuing medicine. With decisive thought, life was again pulling me toward medicine, and it was time to acknowledge this.

To set my own schedule and complete pre-requisite courses for medical school, I developed my own SLP practice that has been operating for over two years. My parents, instrumental in my exposure and initial desire for medicine, supported my endeavors emotionally, with counsel on current medical topics, and allowing me to shadow them and their colleagues extensively. It is with this initial exposure to medicine by my parents, my experiences as a patient, education and SLP background that I feel I am prepared for the challenges and responsibilities awaiting me in medicine."

This is a rough copy of the essay I submitted to AMCAS and AACOMAS. Each application service restricts the number of characters in the essay, so the final product was somewhat different for each, but this essay here is what I had prior to fitting it to the application. I think it describes my history and motivation for medicine pretty well. I like referring to that rather than typing up long posts because it's more thoughtful than what I can write on the fly.

Enjoy!

Halloween in Tijuana (I mean Carbondale)....

2007-10-31T16:22:00.001-05:00

Halloween this year was spent in style down in Carbondale. Actually, we hit the Southern Illinois Wine Trail and had a blast during the day. That night we donned our costumes and hit the pubs.

Kathy and Luke :)

Kathy was obviously a little devil and Luke went as a university professor.

Here's my glorious costume - the Southern Illinois uniform, as I like to call it. NO, I'm not pregnant, but that's a pretty sweet Nascar shirt, don't ya think?

My sheet (baby) kept falling down all night - I guess I was having a boy!

These guys were hilarious at the bar. They are dressed as Miller delivery guys with a homosexual flair.

Just because I'm "pregnant" doesn't mean I can't party at the Copper Dragon!

Earlier in the day at Pomona Winery. That would be some yummy Orchard Spice Joe's pouring in his glass.

I had such a lovely red glow all day from the wine!

Dick in a box.

More cowbell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Randall Falker!!!!!

Not my baby daddy. :(

Breaking News!!!

2007-10-24T18:34:00.000-05:00

I got into medical school today!!!! I'm going to be a doctor!!!!!! Midwestern-CCOM called me today to let me know the adcom accepted me and that I will be getting my packet in the mail.

O.M.G.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Looks like I need to update my upcoming events calendar:
10/26-10/28 visit to Southern Illinois
11/4 Anakin Birthday party
11/15 - KCOM interview ?????????
11/22-11/25 Thanksgiving
11/26 Anniversary
12/7-12/9 Retreat weekend

C'MON SIU - give me some love! You know I am a die-hard Saluki fan! I LOVE YOU!!!!! LOVE ME BACK, DAMMIT!!!!!!

Upcoming events....

2007-10-24T07:44:00.000-05:00

10/26-10/28 visit to Southern Illinois
10/31 - WVSOM interview
11/4 Anakin Birthday party
11/9- Nova interview
11/15 - KCOM interview
11/22-11/25 Thanksgiving
11/26 Anniversary
12/7-12/9 Retreat weekend

Down on the world again...

2007-10-23T07:50:00.000-05:00

My audit went well but this past weekend was a nightmare. I can't even write about it for fear I'll break down again but my spirit is just broken. It will get better over time and counseling I hope but right now I feel like my heart has been ripped out of my chest and thrown in a fire. Maybe I'll write more in the future but it's too painful now.

Still no news from CCOM. The latest as of yesterday is that I should call back on Thursday. I would like to know soon so I can make/cancel my travel plans to West Virginia. Although a trip to West Virginia to get away would be nice right about now.

Everything else is just work, work, work.

Audit.....

2007-10-18T09:53:00.000-05:00

Nothing gives you that sick feeling like a letter in the mail that you are going to be audited. It's not the IRS, but the state of Illinois checking up on its therapists and what they keep in their files. They do give us ~ a month to prepare, but I suck at filing so I have to hunt down all the paperwork they specifically request for the files they request. This year I'm being audited on 8 clients, which is a load off. 2 years ago I think it was 15. With applying to med school and trying to run my business, it's a pain and keeps me from doing other things. At any rate, my audit is today at 10:30am so when I'm done typing this, I'm out the door. At least they meet me here in town instead of me driving to Chicago!

Update on medical school application process:
Still waiting on CCOM's decision. The admissions department told me the adcom is meeting "at the end of this week" and after decisions are made, they are sent to the Dean, who signs off on them. They said I should hear back next week sometime and I'm crossing every appendage I have for them.

In the meantime, I still have my WVSOM and Nova interviews scheduled, but my DO letter is still not in. I'll probably call the doc tomorrow and see what the holdup is. I don't necessarily need it before the interviews, but the adcoms can't make a decision until they have it, so I'm stuck until it arrives.

Short entry today, but I gotta run for the audit..... yikes!

Waitlisted and more interviews....

2007-09-28T20:38:00.001-05:00

Going through this application process, I can begin to empathize with people who suffer from bipolar disorder or manic depressive issues. Applying to medical school consists of such ups and downs, and the process is somewhat random in the way the schools pick and choose applicants for interview/rejection/etc.

At any rate, here's my med school application process in a nutshell again via mdapplicants. It's a nice website that allows me to keep track of everything going on.

Update so far: Still waiting on CCOM decision (sometime mid-late October) and received interview invitations from West Virginia School of Osteopathic Medicine for 10/31 and Nova Southeastern University College of Osteopathic Medicine for 11/9. Of course if I receive a CCOM acceptance I'll cancel them, but at this point, and with the outcome of my DMU interview, I need to plan on going.

I got an e-mail back from the admissions committee from DMU and the only concerns about my application was my "lack of science courses". Whatever. I took everything except biochemistry and have handled a rigorous schedule for the last 5 years of my life. Oh well, at least that gives me an idea of how to improve my application for next year if I'm not accepted anywhere - read: take biochem!

CCOM interview, KCOM hold

2007-09-22T17:08:00.000-05:00

My Midwestern-CCOM interview was this past Friday and I feel like it went extremely well. Better than my DMU interview the week before. Got there at 7:30am and the day started at 8am with an intro from the director of admissions and the dean. We were given our schedule and were split into 2 groups - Group A and B. Group A had their interviews first and a Financial Aid presentation after, and group B had a FA presentation first and interviews after Group A. Interviews were spaced 30 minutes apart and 2 people were interviewed at a time in two different rooms. I was one of the lucky ones to interview first at 8:30am. It was kinda neat - I was the first interview of the year at CCOM!

Anyway, it was a panel interview, like at DMU, with a faculty member, a DO and a student. The DO was running late, so it was just a faculty member and a student interviewing me. The interview was closed-file, meaning they had a copy of my CV, AACOMAS essay, and secondary information I sent in. No info on grades or MCAT scores. They asked pretty softball questions such as "Why DO?", "Why CCOM?", "How do you relieve stress?" and a few problem-solving questions, but nothing that really made me sweat. They were very personable and I felt my performance was very fluid, which for me is great because I tend to trip up on words when I'm nervous.

After the interview, and since I interviewed first, I had some down-time to chit-chat with the other interviewees and they were all nice. We all seemed to be self-starters and go-getters in the interview group. I think half of us were non-trads, which was really nice! The financial aid was a bit depressing. I'll probably be borrowing as much money as my house is worth for med school costs (for all 4 years), but at least it's a lucrative profession and the investment return is pretty good. After the last group interviewed, we had a student tour. The campus is nice - in a wooded oasis in Downer's Grove (these suburbs are all retailed-up. You can't go a mile without running into a Starbuck's, Borders, McD's, etc.). We didn't get to see any labs though because they were set up for a practical that was about to start. After the tour, we had lunch (on the school) and that was the end of our day. I was on my way home by 1:30pm.

For the second part of my post title, I've been waiting to hear back from ATSU-KCOM - A DO school in Kirksville, MO, and I just got a letter today that I've been put on hold. That was a bummer because I thought my stats were fine for that school. Maybe since I'm so close to Chicago they are looking for people who don't have the Illinois in-state luxury. My MCAT score is a little low, but my GPA is average for admission, so I don't think it's my numbers or application. At least that's what I'm telling myself to try not to feel too bad! I was pretty bummed earlier when I got that letter because I thought I had a higher-than-average chance for interview. Oh well, C'est la vie, nes pas?

Oh, and in other news, I got picked in the Illinois EI audit lottery. Yay. I have 8 files that need to be reviewed next month. Blech.

DMU interview

2007-09-17T15:16:00.001-05:00

So, last Friday I had my interview at Des Moines University-College of Osteopathic Medicine. I drove out there on Thursday afternoon, and it took about 4.5 hours from home to the hotel near campus. Had dinner with my aunt Thursday night (they live in a Des Moines suburb) and spent the rest of the evening in the hotel room and turned in at 10pm.

Woke up the next morning at 6:30am - felt terrible because I was tossing and turning all night! Got to the admissions office at 8:30am on the dot and checked in (10 minute drive + parking at the university). The day kicked off with a presentation on the university and a "get-to-know-you" session between all the interviewees. Then we had a financial aid presentation. Tuition is around 32K and it will cost about 50K a year to attend school there if you have to borrow for all needs. Yikes! After this we toured the patient sim and surgical skills labs, then had a demonstration on OMM. We finished will all of this around 12pm and were directed to lunch until 1pm. Those that had interview at 1:15pm went up to the interview waiting area and the rest went on a tour. I was in the 1:15pm pool. There was also a mini-fridge with juice, water, soda, and nutri-grain bars for us to indulge in.

My interviewers were a biochemistry professor, a D.O., and a 2nd year student. These are the following questions I remember:

1. Have you been to Des Moines before?
2. Are you ready for this? Do you really want to do this?
3. Why osteopathy?
4. Have you shadowed a D.O.?
5. Do you see yourself in the ER? (I shadowed an ER D.O.)
6. Tell me about a problem client and what you did to remedy this.
7. How will you handle biochemistry, which is the hardest subject and one you have no experience with?
8. Why qualities do you like about DMU?
9. What is one quality a friend would say you have?
10. Discuss an ethical situation you've faced in your career.
11. What will you do if you don't get in?

There were more, but I can't remember all of them - yikes!

The interview itself was ok - all except the biochem question, but I realize the guy asking it was a biochem professor. Even though I've been on 5012 interviews for various things in my life, I felt like this was the first one ever. I was sweating so hard prior to the interview that my skin was "glistening" and with such fair skin, when I speak in public my skin flushes red for the first 5-10 minutes. Anyway, I hope I came across somewhat coherent and pleasant.

Decisions will be made within 2 weeks, so at least I'll know soon enough how much I impressed them.

On to Midwestern-CCOM this week Friday. I REALLY want to impress them!

Hanging out....

2007-09-05T11:30:00.000-05:00

I took this week off for some decompression time and it was MUCH needed. Went down to the lake over the weekend and stayed down in Chester a few extra days to shadow the ER doc, a D.O. for some D.O. shadowing experience. Now mom and I are getting ready to go back to Sandwich for the NIU vs. SIU football game this weekend + the Sandwich Fair. I'm scheduled to retake the MCAT on Friday, but I'm still up in the air about it. I really don't want to retake it, and honestly, I haven't looked at an MCAT book or problem in the last 3 weeks. I'm just so sick of it. I told myself that if I didn't get in this year I'd retake it for next year and spend more time preparing for it.

I personally don't want to retake this beast of an exam, but friends and family are telling me I have nothing to lose. Well, unless I do worse than before. But that would be hard to do I think. Anyway, enough about that. I'm going to take the test and give myself a migraine on Friday but at least it will be done and over with.

Joe went back home on Monday since he had to work this week. He was off last week and got a lot done around the house, but his work messed up his vacation time and he ended up having to take last week without pay. He's not in trouble or anything, but I'm a bit irritated that they told him he had all this vacation time he had to use by the end of his hire date (Sept.) and then turn around and say "oops". So his paycheck will be smaller this week and taxes are due next week and I haven't done my monthly billing yet. Of course it all piles on, right!

Time to get packing here ..... we're hitting the road soon.

2nd interview invite!

2007-08-21T10:55:00.000-05:00

Right on!

I received an interview invitation from Des Moines University College of Osteopathic Medicine!!!!!

My interview date is 9/14/07 (Friday). I've got to reschedule my Friday clients, which will make for LONG Tuesdays and Wednesdays but it's totally worth it!!!!!!!!!!!

Here's the website for DMU's Osteopathic program:

http://www.dmu.edu/com/

They have some advantages over CCOM regarding facilities and learning apparatus, but CCOM is soooooo close to home!

Either way, though, they're both great schools. Looking forward to my future nervous Fridays!

My first interview!!!!!!

2007-08-16T21:41:00.000-05:00

Got the word today that I've been invited for an interview at the Chicago College of Osteopathic Medicine at Midwestern University in Downer's Grove.

Right on!

Scheduled for 9/21 from 7:45am - 1pm.

More about the school:

http://www.midwestern.edu/ccom/

Pictures from the Lenten Trip of Terror....

2007-08-14T22:15:00.001-05:00

It was a dark and stormy Friday night. The Catholic urge for seafood was wearing heavy on our souls. Should we take the familiar, yielding path to the local Knights of Columbus fish fry, or dare to voyage into the dark unknown of the Southeast Missouri bootheel?

The rain beat steadily against our Ford Expedition. My father, hearkening to an innuendo of the best seafood in the tri-state area, labored to find sustenance that would keep us in good standing with our papal authority. Roads were wet, lightning flashed. Was that the left we were supposed to take? Where is the grey pole barn serving as a landmark? Just when it seemed we would never make it, we ventured upon.....

Bonnie's Cafe and Cattle Auction!!!!!!!!

A copy of the menu..... True southern cuisine is not without "blackeyed P's".

Should you need to use the ladies' (or men's) room, you'll pass by the cattle auction hold. A sight to behold!

What cattle auction would be complete without a steer's head on the wall! He just beckons you for a tasty porterhouse, ribeye, or maybe rocky mountain oysters are your bag!

On our way home, we ended up taking the "long way" home, i.e. we got lost on a "short cut". I was able to take some interesting pictures, though. The sun was setting and because of the heat and the earlier storm a nice mist was beginning to settle. With the help of a photo program I turned my pics into black and white and messed with the resolution a little to give some character to them. I plan to print and frame them at home. Oh, I took these with my cell's camera phone (2 MP LG En-V)!

Exhausted....

2007-08-01T22:22:00.001-05:00

Applying to medical school is, in a word, draining. Especially if you've been out of undergrad for 10 years and trying to catch up. I really came to terms with how exhausted I've become last weekend when I actually had to take a break from tailgating at the Buffett concert - to take a nap. With a full night's sleep I couldn't even make it through the day!

I can tell I've really not been myself, either. I'm jumpier than usual, snappier than usual, and my fuse is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay shorter than it used to be. I feel kinda bad about that, especially since I've been sorta taking it out on a certain SDNer in a roundabout sort of way. I still feel this particular SDNer was being too nosy, and Rosie O'Donnell is still a cow in my eyes, but I perpetuated an argument much farther than I should have and normally would have without being under so much stress. Sort of that whole "misery loves company" subconscious acting out I suppose.

I was probably taking out my disdain in general for the SDN administration on this particular SDNer as well. I've seen how catty the female admins/mods were when I was an advisor, and friendly fellow SDN mods relayed how much more catty they've been about some of my posts. Whatever. SDN is an outlet of control for some who may not have much of it in their real lives, so if they want to bitch about me bitching about them, whatever. It's amusing though to have SDN mods/admins be very helpful and happy toward you one moment, and the next be getting PMs from other mods about rude things said "behind closed doors". One thing I definitely have going for me, sometimes good, sometimes bad, is brutal honesty. You'll always know where you stand with me, like it or not. I'm not going to put on airs just to make myself look better and I'm certainly not going to blow smoke up anyone's ass. I also tend to be overly critical (some subconscious self-esteem issues perhaps?). But, of course, my opinion only means as much as one's opinion of me LOL.

So, I don't know, before I return to my topic of the draining nature of medical school applications, I suppose this is a sort-of apology to the Random SDNer that I went nuts on a few weeks back. *sigh* Stress.

Ok, back to exhaustion. Stupid MCAT. Stupid not studying smart for it the first time. Now I'm spending 2-3 hours a night plus 16-hour weekends studying for the Sep. 7 MCAT retake. Plus secondary applications, although I've got most of the ones I need done, save a few allopathic ones that won't even be considered until after my 2nd MCAT. It's just this damn MCAT that's making me crazy. I HAVE to do better than a 23Q this time around. Just have to. Nothing else to say. That was a bullshit score on my part, and I know I SHOULD have done better. Not could have, should have. I've never scored that low on a standardized test, and I know the material (mostly). I'm getting better, I think, but I won't know until the practice tests kick in again in a few weeks. This month is going to F-L-Y.

Since coming to terms with my stress, I haven't really had hive outbreaks, so I think it's now 1.5 months without a serious breakout. I think. No more doxepin or prednisone, amen! That shit'll kick your ass harder than the MCAT! This week I started counting calories again and taking Omega-3, CoQ 10, Acai extract, extra B vitamins, and bee pollen to kick-start my body in to coping with stress and anxiety. So far I feel much better than I have in previous weeks. I still get a little drowsy in the 2-4 O'clock range, but not enough to need to nap. My body doesn't hurt as much either - For the last year or so it seemed I always had a backache, headache, or other ache and just not feeling right. Today I took a 2-mile walk this evening and I felt super. Maybe it's the supplements reducing inflammation and maybe even histamine. How awesome would that be! At any rate, I'm trying to get in the habit of dealing with stress better, especially by not overeating and by not lashing out at others, including my poor husband.

Well, it's almost 11pm and I really need to hit the hay. Just a reminder to my readers that I will be extremely stressed out for another month and then stressed but not so much for several months after that until I either get into medical school or decide on plan B, which is many different things right now and fodder for another blog.

Sup?!

2007-07-23T21:49:00.000-05:00

Jumping back in since it's been a week or two since my last blog post. Plugging away at MCAT study. I wish I had about 2 extra weeks to study but it is what it is. I think the Kaplan program is the better way to go for me, and damn if I didn't wish I did this in the first place. My ugly stubbornness strikes again. Yeah, I know, you're thinking "Meg? Stubborn?" ha ha.

Anyway, I'm finishing up part 1 and have a bunch of reading to get to - luckily tomorrow I have a client from 8-10 and 3-5, and 10-3 free. So plenty of time to catch up at the library since I'll be in Sterling/Rock Falls tomorrow. I'm falling a bit behind on my on-line lectures and quizzes, but I do have some flex time in my schedule that I can push them back a little. Plus right now it's mostly review, except for physics, which is kicking my ass with the theoretical stuff, of which I REALLY need to review, since my last MCAT was very physics-heavy. At any rate, tomorrow will be reading and practice problems in between work.

Spent last weekend in Canada (Ottawa) for Schmales and Mel's weekend. Joe was one of the groomsmen and we had a great time. It was a nice Jewish wedding in the ritziest hotel in Canada. Ottawa's a pretty city - a bit expensive but we had fun. We were with a few rugby couples, of which the men were also groomsmen and we partied pretty hard. Hard enough to know that I was a big pussy last weekend and quit before my husband even. I was in bed by 1 most nights while he was out til 3-3:30am. I don't know how he does it! I'm 7 years younger and he out parties me like it's nothing. The funniest, though, is that every morning, and I mean EVERY morning there is a parade for the changing of the guard at the tomb of Canada's unkown soldier and at 9:45am we got a wakeup call in the form of a marching band past our window. The first night Joe was out late he got in around 3:30am and he thought I had the TV on at first the next morning waking him up - he didn't believe it was a parade til he went to the window. Hilarious! Anyway, it was a nice trip, but we're glad to be back home. And then we're off to Wisconsin this coming weekend for the Jimmy Buffett concert party weekend.

I imagine I'll run into my ex-boyfriend again this year. It was a surprise to open my hotel room the morning after the concert to go get breakfast and see him opening his hotel door literally across the hall from us. It was actually kind of awesome. Success being the best revenge and all.... OK I'm evil.

Another party weekend will be coming up before we know it in October - SIU Homecoming weekend. I think K booked some rooms for us (sweet) and of course mom, dad, and Brian will be there. I suppose we could stay with Brian, but I've never been to his place to know if it's full of smoke smell or not. The one smell that *really* makes me gag. Should be a good time!

This summer has been super busy and so was last summer. I wonder if next year will be the same! Joe leaves for Sturgis in a couple of weeks and that will be the last of the big trips for a while until Thanksgiving when it looks like we're going to go to Anaheim for a B-ball tourney SIU is in. And it will be our anniversary which will be fun to spend in SoCal. Maybe we could go to some posh Hollywood place. Nah - I bet Joe will want to rent a car and try to find Black Kat Kustoms and Mike Ness.

Alright, well I just got back from a nice long walk and need to catch the ending of Big Love before bed!

MCAT Shmemcat!

2007-07-09T21:45:00.000-05:00

I'm not exactly sure why my title bar won't let me put text into it. Nevertheless, this is my dreaded MCAT post. Scores came back last Friday and I was completely floored by what I got. I really was looking for a score of 28 or higher, and ended up with a 23Q. A 23!!!!!!!!!!!! WTF!

Well, after spending the weekend in contemplation of what went wrong, I realized I did not study as much or as appropriately as I should have. I don't know how to explain it, but I shied away from the topics I needed the most help on and kept practicing what I already knew. I guess it was a false sense of security to keep doing well, but it didn't help if I kept doing well in areas I was already good at!!!!!!

So I broke down and bought the Kaplan on-line course to help me keep a study schedule and motivate me now that I've dropped the cash for it. Looking the syllabus over, it looks much better than what I was doing. Now that I'm not taking any courses I also have the time to put into it. I've also got plenty of full weekends to keep from burnout, too. So, that's my plan with the whole mantra of "If at first you don't succeed..... try, try again" in my head.

I went ahead and applied with my current MCAT score. It's enough to for DO schools and I'm still praying that SIU will take pity on me.

Anyway, I cut back on my SDN time. No more mindless posting to distract me. My next MCAT is scheduled for 9/7/07 in Sycamore again. Crossing my fingers for a better score this time.

More kitty pics...

2007-06-21T18:17:00.001-05:00

The Lake House....

2007-06-21T17:25:00.001-05:00

Ahhhh.... Nothing like the fresh air and chance to get away from regular civilization. We spent Memorial Day down in SE Missouri at a vacation home my parents own. It sits on a small lake with clean water and great neighbors.

Here's the front view of the house. It's a lot bigger inside than it looks. The black car is mine, and that's my parent's dog Baxter looking to help bring in the supplies from WalMart.

Here's the view looking off to the right past the house. You can see the roof of the boat dock peeking over the hill. It's nice to see grass and landscaping! Last time I was there it was pretty rocky soil and just dirt.

The kitchen! The heart of a lake house! Actually this is one of my favorite rooms because it has the coffee maker. Late nights and early mornings means relying on hot java to get me through. I like the tin backsplash. This was taken at night, and there is a window over the sink that gives a natural lighting during the day. And..... what's a vacation home without some Bud and Miller Lite?

This is a nice picture of the living room looking out from the kitchen. The house has a very open floor plan with the kitchen, dining area, and living room all one big room. To the right (out of the frame) are the master bedroom, bathroom, and wooden stairs that go to the basement. To the left (out of frame) are the doors that lead to the screened porch. You can see the deck promenade through the windows here and stairs that lead down to the ground.

The covered deck. This is probably my favorite place in the house. It has a fabulous 270-degree view of the lake and property. It's relatively cool in the summer and warm enough in the winter to enjoy the fresh air without the bugs bothering you. The ceiling is marvelous and that table is heavy.

Back to the outside pictures! This shot was taken on the promenade looking out at the lake. My dad just put in that flagpole a few weeks before Memorial Day and it looks really nice, especially when viewed from the lake on the boat. What he really needs is a cannon - the landscaping makes the back yard look like a fort when viewed from the lake!

Here's a side view of the house looking from the left side to the right side. You can see the screened porch has great visibility around the property. That's the kitchen window open there. Beneath the screened porch is another table-area with tiki lights and such. That's Joe standing there waiting for me to take the picture so we can get out on the boat.

Back inside to the basement. This is the great room and what you see when you come down the stairs. To the left (out of the frame) is a bedroom and bathroom, and to the right (out of the frame) is another bedroom, a wetbar, and laundry/utility room. Doors leading outside are immediately left of the picture (out of frame).

Here's a different view of the basement taken in front of the window. You can see the wet bar and the opening to one of the bedrooms on the right.

Ahhhhh.... the party portion! You can see the Tiki Bar on the boat dock and the lovely pontoon boat we troll around on. The shed is set up for a stereo, which we actually hooked up later that day. There's a ladder off the dock if you want to swim and looking just past the boat dock in that little inlet you can sometimes see a family of beavers that swim around looking for food. Sometimes there's snakes too. Cottonmouths, and water moccasins. No worries - they are only out usually in the morning.

View of the house looking up from the boat dock. You can see why we nickname it "the fort"!

Here's another view of the house from the lake.

Baxter coming to give kisses!

Beau (aka Bobo, Bocephus, Bobodog) takes a break from playing catch the frisbee.

Joe, Brian, and Brad chilling during a boat ride.

And finally, Pete and Nibbles cuddling with one another!

Back in the saddle......

2007-06-14T19:00:00.000-05:00

Took a longer than expected hiatus from the blogosphere!

Backtracking to May:

1. School is finally over. Got an A in Organic Chemistry and honored it - woo! I actually really enjoyed my year of Orgo. "Good Times with Chemicals" should be the alternate name for this class. It's hard, mostly because there are a lot of rules to remembering reaction mechanisms based on the reactants and substrates, but the rules are logical and if you can remember the definition of Lewis acids and bases, you can work your way through the problems. Physics was not so good for me though. I put a lot more time and effort into Orgo, and ended up with a C in Physics. I laughed and I moaned because I haven't had a C in college for literally 13 years. Oh well. Nothing I can do about it, and I'm not going to retake the damn course. It wasn't bad, but it was boring as hell.

2. May 31. MCAT. D-Day. A day that will live in infamy. I was able to do a few reschedules and get into the testing center in Sycamore that day. I only had to drive 40 minutes compared to 2.5 hours in Peoria. Test started at noon and I was done around 4pm. It was a bitch of a test, too. Hardest I've ever taken. I was smart to start studying early, but I should have done more practice problems. The first section was Physical Sciences - 52 questions and 70 minutes. It covered all things Inorganic Chemistry and Physics. This was the hardest section for me. It was extremely Physics-heavy, and very conceptually based. Not many calculations, more theory. I finished with about 5-10 minutes left to review my work. I think I guessed on 5 questions. Next was Verbal Reasoning. Not much to say about it except that you're given written passages and you have to answer questions about them. Kinda like the GRE. Next were the writing samples - two 30-minute sections with each section having a topic to write about. Whatever, I think I did fine. Lastly was Biological Sciences. Same deal - 52 questions and 70 minutes. It was very physiology-heavy with only a few Organic Chemistry questions. I felt pretty confident, but there were a few I missed after seeing some questions discussed on SDN. I'm not too worried yet. I finished with about 25 minutes to spare, went over my answers, and just stopped the test with 10 minutes to go. I wasn't going to change my answers and I wanted to get the hell out of there.

Walking out of the center was a huge relief, even if I was unsure of my performance. I was just happy to have it DONE. I still have to wait for my scores, which come out sometimes around July 3, or so the AAMC says.

3. Memorial Day Weekend. I still have photos to post, but we went down to the lake house and had such a good time! It was just me and Joe this year and we met up with my folks, brother, and some of my brother's friends. Good food, boating, and drinky-drinks for a 3-day weekend. Absolutely fabulous! On the way home, we bought $500 worth of fireworks and got an extra $150 worth from a sale they had, so we have $650 worth of fireworks in our basement waiting for the 4th to go down to a friend's house in the country and light these suckers off. We got some excellent ones this year with enough TNT to knock your socks off. Yes, yes, I know. It's all fun and games until someone loses a finger!

Now for June updates!

1. Completed my AMCAS and AACOMAS applications! AMCAS is the application service for MD schools and AACOMAS is the application service for DO schools. Everything is submitted and I'm just waiting on my one damn transcript to arrive and be processed from the college I was at this year. It was sent last week Monday and probably got to their office a week ago. I'm supposed to give them 10 business days, but I requested another one to be sent today just in case. So, as soon as my application is verified and my MCAT scores are posted, hopefully I'll start receiving my secondary applications to the schools I'm applying to. In all, I'm applying to about 30 schools. I may whittle it down if my MCAT is great, or I may add if my MCAT sucks.

2. OPM conference. Met up with Jill and Sarah for a pre-med conference geared toward non-traditional students. It was a 3-day weekend event and I knew I was going more for social interaction than to attend all the lectures. I went to 3 and found them interesting, but having already submitted my applications by then, it was rather redundant information for me. But I had fun with the girls. Ate a lot of sushi (YUM!!!!!!!). The first night we met up with an internet friend who is a med student at the University of Chicago and had dinner at Oysy Sushi House on Michigan and 9th St. (www.oysysushi.com). Dinner was fantastic and we stuffed ourselves. I think the best thing I tasted was the Toro Tartar with Caviar. Of course, I had my standard Unagi (eel), Ika (squid), Uni (sea urchin), Ikura (salmon roe), California Roll, and some other stuff like tempura, etc. Living in Sandwich, there's not much in the way of Sushi, so I only get to have it a couple of times a year. But I really love it! Typically, I prefer Sashimi because I don't like to eat all that rice, but some of the girls like the rice so we stuck with Sushi. I had lunch at some Greek restaurant near Wheeling one day and it was fantastic!!!!! I'm currently having this love affair with olive oil, garlic, and eggplant anyway, and decided that I could eat Greek for the rest of my life and not complain. We also ate at Benihana's one night. Hibachi is fun, and we had more sushi and I opted for cooked scallops, shrimp, and calamari on the hibachi. Funny - our chef was Mexican, not Asian!

3. Got my outfits for our trip to Schmales' and Mel's wedding in Canada. Joe's actually getting fitted for his tux tonight. Since her colors are just black and white, I opted for something black so I can match my husband when we get our groove on. Since he's in the wedding party, I'll probably sit with some of the wives of the other guys that are groomsmen too. They rock and we'll have lots of fun. I'm really excited about this trip - the bride comes from a wealthy family and they are getting married in a posh hotel in Ottawa and should be a good time. A lot different than my own wedding - I had a down-home wedding complete with pig roast and VFW venue :). But oh was it fun, and it's still the talk of Chester! LOL! I used to be such a snob about those things but certainly life has made me more realistic and understanding of what's really important. It was important to me to have a pretty wedding (dress, decoration, cake) but also important that my guests have a good time, meaning good food (pig roast!) and free beer and mixed drinks all night. Plus, lots of Elvis, Jimmy Buffett, Johnny Cash, and Social Distortion from the DJ. Not to mention a honeymoon at Disney ha ha! Good times, good times.

In the present:
So, I'm still waiting on my transcript from Waubonsee to be sent to AMCAS and AACOMAS. Work has picked up since school's out and I'm actually working like a friggin' dog so we can pay off extraneous debt in the event I do get into med school.

I started working out again today and it felt so good. I was getting tired of being on Doxepin, Singulair, Claritin, Zyrtec, Benadryl, and Prednisone all the time (like every month) and I've actually been lucky that I haven't had hives in almost 2 weeks now nor needed to take medicine (knock on wood). The horrible thing about having hives is the medicine you have to take that makes you extremely lethargic and HUNGRY. So yeah, I've put on weight and I can really start to feel the effects. Not just in tight clothing, but my energy and fitness levels are so low. I took a walk on a mile-long path yesterday in between clients at a forest preserve and felt like crap for the whole walk. I realized I needed to get my ass to the gym because I've never been that out of shape. So now I'm back at the gym, and that problem is solved. I can't wait until the "hive effects" as I call them are gone and I feel better.

Well, I think I'm all caught up now and can now resume to my daily and/or weekly posting. Hopefully I'll have some positive news soon about my transcript and processing of my med school application!

Another Practice Test...

2007-05-05T20:37:00.000-05:00

I finally finished reviewing all the material from the Examkrackers books for the MCAT last night. Woo hoo!!!!!! So, today I took another practice test - AAMC CBT 5. I did pretty good! I got a 35 (13B 11P 11V). If I can do this well on the real thing - that would be fantastic!

The semester is coming to a close - finally! Next week is the last week of classes. I have a Physics exam Monday, then the Physics lab final on Wednesday. Final exams are after next week, and I have Physics on Monday (5/14) and Organic Chem on Thursday (5/17). Then it's OVER!!!!!!!!!!!! At least until I find out my fate for med school.

I've been thinking about pursuing nursing if I don't get into med school in the hopes of eventually going to CRNA school or becoming an NP. I thought about the PA option, but I'm just not sure about that. Medicine is fascinating for me, hence my physician aspirations. But if it's not in the cards for me, anesthesia is still an option through a different route. I enjoy what my dad does, so it's not necessarily a "rejection" in life if I go that route. Just not the way I'd hoped. I still need to think more about it, and probably just worry about it if I don't get in to medical school! But let's pray for the best - that I get into med school on the first go around this year!

Hiatus....

2007-04-29T15:27:00.000-05:00

Classes are winding down for the semester and MCAT study is picking up like crazy. Next week I finish reading the EK MCAT series and after that I'll be working on practice problems and practice tests.

I have AAMC 5R-10 (6 practice exams) to do over the next month.

It will be a few more weeks until my next post, though. I have exams this week, next week, and the week after, and I'm taking the MCAT May 31 in Peoria. So pretty much the month of May will be hectic for me, but it's only 1 more month!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Vacation rules!!!!!!!!!

2007-03-22T12:02:00.000-05:00

Even though I didn't go very far away (Southern Illinois) and I'm swapping regular work for MCAT study and shadowing, I'm still having a great time. It's nice to not have to think about school or work for a week and concentrate on other things.

I don't know how much time I'll have to write about things today - I'm waiting for my mom to get home from the clinic so we can go out to the Lake House and do some Spring cleaning before "opening weekend" on Saturday.

Topics I want to write about in the near future:

1. MCAT study progress
2. Recap of my week off
3. SIU B-ball (I'll have to wait until after tonight though. They play Kansas for an elite 8 spot - gonna be tough)
4. People who think they know everything about everything and really know a little bit about a little bit. (I'm probably included in that population, but since this is my blog, I get to talk about other people LOL)
5. Why I love Southern Illinois but may never move back

So, I'll start with 1. MCAT study progress:

I'm on my 3rd week of the Examkracker's 10-week study schedule. So far I'm able to keep up with the readings, but I'm falling behind on practice problems. I've got all my reading done early this week so I can work on practice problems tomorrow night and on the ride back home with Joe if I feel I need more practice. I've read over the problems and feel I have an excellent grasp on Biology at this point, but I really need to do some Physics and Chem problems in MCAT form so I'm used to them. Verbal is, well, verbal. I have all these extra MCAT materials that I don't think I'm going to use, but I think I'll keep them for a little while.

I'm still debating on whether to keep my current MCAT date or to see if I can change it to a later date in May or June. I just don't know if I'm going to be ready for the test, and I would really like to have a few extra weeks to work on harder Chem, Physics and Orgo material, although I really should just take it May 11. The benefit to keeping my current date is that I get my test scores sooner and will be able to retake sooner if I don't do as well as I like.

2. Weekly recap: I'm going to save this for when I get back home so I can include what I experience in the OR and clinic tomorrow.

To be continued (mom is home and we're off to the lake)......

In the words of Carol Ann....

2007-03-13T14:11:00.000-05:00

"They're back."

Ugh! These hives just won't go away. I thought they were gone since I had little to no outbreak for almost a month, and then yesterday, Wham! Out of the blue my upper body and torso were covered, and my upper lip looked like Janice Dickinson took me on a Restylane injection spree.

I am so frustrated with it now. And I think the worst part is that very few people actually take it seriously. Everyone I'm in contact with sees the hives on my hands or arms, so I kind of have to explain them. As soon as I'm done, everyone seems to have "the cure", like I've never thought of what could possibly be causing this debilitating condition! I know most people are trying to help, but seriously, when I say I've had them for 6 months, don't they think I might have tried to figure out why they happen?

My favorite was during an ER visit in January. The doctor was so sure he knew why I had hives. Must be something you ate! Must be detergent! Must be animals! Must be this, must be that! Sorry, everything you've mentioned, doc, I experimented with. Thanks for playing, though. And the same thing from people I see day to day. "Oh, my cousin's uncle's great-granddaughter's girl scout leader had them! Hers were cured by adding an eye of newt to toenail clippings of a horse and then spread over the affected area!"

These kinds of "helpful" comments are beginning to drive me nuts, as is the incessant itching. Before you try to tell me "they're only trying to help!", believe me, I know. I smile and nod and seethe inside, but I'm nice about it. Then I get home and vent to my family and to my blog.

I wish Prednisone weren't such a bad drug to take long-term. It was a God-send after my ER visit.

At any rate, I was so pissed off last night that I vowed to get a 2nd opinion from a reputable allergist. I've got an appointment with a Rush allergist downtown on 3/26. I'm going to have to miss part of a lab in orgo, but I'll take it over hives any day. The allergist I saw the first time around was nice, but her office and practice sucked. I have yet to hear the results of blood work that was done 2 months ago and they won't return my calls. Oh well - I'll let the new allergist do whatever she needs to do on me, and the bonus is that it's a team-style approach, so I'll be seen by a few doctors rather than just one who seemed too busy anyway.

My mom thinks it's stress. I am beginning to feel like either my body has developed some sort of autoimmune response or it's caused by pressure from my weight gain.

Oh yeah.....

2007-03-04T12:59:00.000-06:00

GO DAWGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

They play Creighton today for the MVC Championship Tourney Title (but are already going to the Big Dance)

Woot!

Back in the game.......

2007-03-04T12:52:00.000-06:00

Today marks the 10-week spot before the May 11 MCAT. Meaning, I have 10 weeks to prepare. So, I decided to follow the Examkracker's 10-week MCAT study schedule, starting today with AAMC 4 practice CBT.

I did decently for the start of the schedule with my breakdown as follows:

BS 10
PS 10
VR 9

Total 29

My husband was inadvertently annoying me with loud laughing, popcorn popping and snapping fingers/clapping to some hilarious show he was watching. As a non-premed, he is unaware of the absolute SILENCE we need to take our practice exams, and how anal we are at any little noise that interferes with our silence. This was only during the verbal section, though, and I think I could have gotten one point higher if not for the distraction.

Anyway, this score renews my hope that I can do well come May 11. In fact, I'd better do well. I've been sequestered from social activities, except for a mandatory birthday party yesterday and have been isolated from friends and family for what seems like forever! I'm taking a small break during Spring break but I will be pretty much in solitude for the next 10 weeks until the MCAT is done with.

Ugh.

MCAT Practice Test Scores:

3/4/07 AAMC 4 CBT: P 10 B 10 V 9 = 29
3/2/07 Free Princeton Review CBT: P 5 B 7 V 6 = 18 (WTF????????????)
2/28/07 Free Kaplan CBT: P 11 B 12 VR 10 = 33
1/5/07 AAMC 3R: P 10 B 9 VR 8 = 27

Reality Check...

2007-03-02T15:24:00.000-06:00

Shit.

I took Princeton Review's online MCAT CBT and BOMBED it. Really bad. I don't know if I was just anxious to get it over with, tired, hungry, or whatever, but my score sucked. BIG TIME.

I definitely need to review the Physical Sciences more, but really my scores were all pretty bad, and I'm not really sure why given my AAMC 3R and Kaplan score.

Anyway, here's the breakdown:

VR: 6
BS: 7
PS: 5
Total: 18

Wow. Just.......... Wow.

MCAT Practice Test Scores:

3/2/07 Free Princeton Review CBT: P 5 B 7 V 6 = 18 (WTF????????????)
2/28/07 Free Kaplan CBT: P 11 B 12 VR 10 = 33
1/5/07 AAMC 3R: P 10 B 9 VR 8 = 27

For Your Listening Pleasure.....

2007-02-28T22:38:00.000-06:00

Saluki Men

Go Southern Go!

Eat 'Em Up!

SIU Cheer

Go Dawgs!

MCAT Study Update....

2007-02-28T20:33:00.000-06:00

I took the free Kaplan CBT posted on their website tonight. Here's the breakdown:

PS: 11
VR: 10
BS: 12
Total: 33

Ok, so this *looks* like a great score, but the problem is I did a LOT of guessing, especially in the Physical Sciences section.

My overall problem areas were:
Electrochemistry esp. Redox
Titrations
Some thermodynamics
Physics I haven't learned yet (electricity)
Stoichiometry (OMG I am so embarrassed about this!)
Orgo I haven't learned yet

I guess it's not TOO bad. I'm going to be taking the free Princeton Review CBT sometime this week also.

MCAT Practice Test Progress Chart:
2/28/07 Free Kaplan CBT: P 11 B 12 VR 10 = 33
1/5/07 AAMC 3R: P 10 B 9 VR 8 = 27

A word on bathroom etiquette for the ladies......

2007-02-25T18:46:00.000-06:00

Please, for the love of God, if you are in a public bathroom with 20 open stalls, and ONE person is in there doing their business, do NOT go and occupy the stall next to her if there are a plethora of open stalls. Give some space! Seriously - no one wants to hear you "toot your horn" if they don't have to.

Even men don't crowd each other at the urinals!

I've been workin' on Chem railroad, all the live-long day....

2007-02-25T18:34:00.000-06:00

So Bio's been put to bed for quite some time now and I'm still working on Chem review. I thought it would all come back to me like Bio where I didn't really have to "study" the chapters, just do the questions and 30-minute exams. Boy, was I W-R-O-N-G. Wrong wrong wrong! I got A's in both semesters and labs for Gen Chem but that info went in one ear and out the other. My biggest areas of pain are thermodynamics, solutions, and kinetics. Jaysus I did piss-poor on the end of chapter questions! So now I'm on Chapter 5/7 and pounding through but it's taking forever! I'm definitely going to be doing 1001 problems in Gen. Chem soon.

So tonight I will finish Ch. 5-7, leaving me the seven 30-minute exams to do this week, putting me only a week behind so far. Luckily Physics and Ochem are fresh in my brain since I'm taking them now (well part 2 for each), but I've been recalling all the Newton's laws in class so it's still somewhat fresh.

We had our first Organic Chem exam on Thursday and I have mixed feelings. It was half multiple choice and half synthesis and retrosynthesis composition. The good part is that it seemed most multiple choice came exactly from our practice test and the synthesis/retro were typical problems we covered. So, I finished in about 30 minutes and felt pretty good about probably getting an A on the exam - huge!!!! Now that a few nights have passed, I've been dreaming that I totally blew it. I really wish the results would get posted soon so I know how I did. I know I got the one extra credit question right since I looked it up right after the exam. Actually, I'm pretty confident about all the non-multiple choice questions. I just keep having the fear that they MC questions were manipulatives of the practice test questions and that the answers I put were wrong!!!!!! Oh well. I guess there's no reason to worry until the grades come out. Hopefully my gut instinct is correct!

Bio down, Chem, Physics and Orgo to go....

2007-02-15T21:33:00.000-06:00

I finished with the EK Bio book, answering the chapter questions and doing all of the 30-minute MCAT questions. At first I started out with a 7, then moved on to 9's until the end when I was getting 7's. I'm not sure why I did so badly at the beginning, except maybe I just got used to the question format towards the end. It really seemed that once you got the hang of the paragraph format, it was easy to deduce answers from them. At any rate, I'm done with that book and have my notes to go on.

Now it's on to Gen. Chem. I'll be working on the chapter reviews this weekend and start on the 30-minute MCATs. I hate to say it, but the hardest review in Gen Chem for me will be the general math at the beginning - reminding myself of how to get a molecular formula from an empirical formula, and some other stuff. The other areas of concern for me are redox reactions (electrochemistry) and some acid-base stuff. I also need to review Le Chatlier's principle and equilibrium too. It will all be review, though - I'm glad I paid attention when I had those classes and got A's. I'm glad I had instructors who insisted we learn the material and not just "get on with the syllabus".

I'm saving Physics and Orgo for last since I'm currently taking them. I've covered probably 50-60% of what's on the MCAT in those subjects from last semester.

So far, my goal is to finish Gen Chem, Orgo, and Physics review + 30-minute MCATs and take another full-length practice exam. Then just keep working out problems in my EK 1001 books, and I also decided to get Kaplan's Qbank for more problem-solving.

So for my loyal readers who are also in the MCAT rush with me, this is where I am so far. And let's hope I can stay on this schedule!

A deadly sin....

2007-02-12T22:45:00.001-06:00

What are the seven deadly sins? We have lust, gluttony, pride, envy, sloth, greed, and wrath. We all know how lust can kill (uhhh husband comes home early and has a FOID card). Gluttony causes all sorts of health problems. Pride will get you 20-life, just ask Jake Heke. Envy will also get you 20-life. Watch CSI. I equate sloth with hippies, who end up stoned out of their minds, and greed will get you to where Anna Nicole Smith was going.

Wrath, though - wrath is really a sneaky vice. Can sometimes go with pride, but is just as destructive in its elemental form. Everyone experiences anger at some point in their lives, and unlike the other deadly sins, anger in itself is not bad. It's when it becomes an all-consuming beast that displaces your happy thoughts and causes you to sink into painful memories. Wrath will slowly sink its fangs into you until you are a prisoner in a searing vice-grip of rage, resentment, and fury. It becomes even more menacing when it's bottled inside. When you think you have control over it. When you think you've won and you're at peace. It's then when it comes with the surprise return, like an expired restraining order and busts through your peaceful, collected facade and beats you down.

Ever since I left New Zealand I have had this almost inhuman animosity for my ex that makes me feel almost like a different person when I talk or even think of him. The vitriol that erupts when I vent about my feelings toward him truly scares me. It really does frighten me that I sometimes placate myself with the thought that he's much older than me and soon he'll be dead and off of the same world I live on.

It's been 7 years this year since I've been home from that fucked up ordeal, and still I can't help but cringe and become nauseated when I think of him. Funny - it's not as if he physically or sexually abused me, but there was definitely a lot of "mind-fucking" that went on, and I fell for everything, hook-line-and-sinker. It wasn't until I was actually FACED with his crimes of deception and thievery did I truly understand who, no what he was. A pathological liar and sociopath. A man who stole from my family and tricked me into thinking he was innocent. A man who stole from ME, and tricked me into thinking he was innocent.

And then recently, by chance, we came across each other on MSN Messenger. Why not see what he's up to and answer his PM's? Big mistake. He politely tells me he's had a child, been to Bible college, and now owns a bakery in Whangarei. What the fuck am I supposed to say? Congratu-fucking-lations you fucking liar?! It was nice that he sent a pic of his daughter, but after all the lies - lies that HE even believed after telling them for so long, I don't know if HE even know what parts of his life are true and what parts he WISHES were true.

Bible college - that's a good one. Even if it is true - this man is the farthest thing from being saved as there ever was. This is a man who posed as the nephew of a "Catholic bishop in New Zealand" and stole money from the Newman Center in Carbondale, IL. He was a fake and a phony at the Catholic summer camp where we met, pretending to be a Eucharistic minister and ultimately blaspheming the Lord from sunup to sundown. And I fell for it all, as did everyone - he was a PRO. He stole several identities and was actually busted for it - in several countries - something I found out waaaaay too late.

The "bakery" in Whangarei. This one got the biggest laugh from me! This guy posed as an ex-"chef" having worked as one in the Army and supposedly in nice restaurants in New Zealand. No, he was a cook in the army, and as far as chef - probably flipped burgers at the local McDonalds. You see, embellishments were the entry way for full-fledged lying for him. My parents could spot it a hundred miles away - especially when he made them a pumpkin pie that was shit. Something that would be the easiest thing on earth for a "chef" to make - or at least follow directions for.

My ultimate favorite was when I was directed to a "classmates" kind of website for New Zealanders, and on one site he describes himself as a chef, and another, and I specifically quote: "41 years old and living in Auckland. Just finshed Medical School working as a 1st Yr resident at Whangarei Regional Hospital"

What a lying motherfucker. He twisted my dreams and plans around in his twisted mind, and believes that HE actually graduated from medical school and is a medical resident? This guys NEEDS to be institutionalized.

There is so much more I could write about, but then my post would be too too long.

I don't know what it will take to give myself peace about my hatred for this man. I thought I could make peace by sending a letter to him, which I did via e-mail. I was nice, but firm in telling him that he's a royal fuck-up and I don't believe a damn word he says, and that he'd better realize that life is going to catch up with him (a la GREED, SLOTH, and ENVY). I thought that would make me feel better, and it did for about a week.

And now I still feel this violent resentment for all of the things he KNOWINGLY put me through, and somewhat at myself for being so damn gullible. It would make me feel better if he never stepped foot into society again. It would make me feel better if he got hit by a bus. It would make me feel better if he took his goofy, doop-de-doo grin and was drug down a gravel road face down. It would make me feel better if he stopped believing the lies he creates. It would make me feel better if he never reproduced again. Not only is there a child out there now that he can't take care of, but may possibly have his fucked-up genes. Maybe it would make me feel better if he really got some sort of comeuppance, as his contact with me has always been filled with general, generic, polite salutations and "best-wishes". Lots of "I wish you all the best", "I wish you all the happiness in the world" bullshit. Hey! Hey! Motherfucker! You fucked me over in a Lifetime movie sort-of way so stop being all goody-goody and pretending it never happened! Stop acting like your shit doesn't stink and you don't have a felony record in three countries! Maybe it would make me feel better for him to read this blog post to know how much he fucked up and that it's ready to bite him in the ass.

No, I'm not going to waste the time and money to go back to New Zealand to do anything to, for, or with that putrid, low, slimy, oozing piece of infestation. I don't necessarily believe in Karma, but I do think there is some sort of force that balances the world and creates a goes-around-comes-around action. And his come-around action will probably be pissing off the wrong bloke and looking down the barrel of a gun for his last memory. I truly believe that's the only thing that can stop a man like this, and God save the man or woman whose task this falls to.

I don't think I've ever really vented to anyone this graphically about my ex, except for my husband, Joe. I finally discussed my full relationship with this man to my friends and family when I came home from New Zealand, but I always preferred to not talk about it, and only talk about it when other brought it up. Last night I talked with Kathy about it for quite a while and realized I needed to do something to get over it.

I don't know if it will take more time, or for me to do what I just did - spew it all out there so it's not inside of me. That's what blogs and journals are for, right? To have a place to store emotions you don't need to keep bottled inside? I anticipate writing a few more times about him when my wrath violates its restraining order on my soul. Eventually this wrath will see that it's not welcome and not affecting me anymore and will completely go away, never to bother me again. In the meantime, though, in the fashion of a battered woman, I'm working up the courage to leave my wrath, but I haven't got the courage and strength just yet. Or maybe I'm needing to play the victim a little longer. At any rate, I'm looking forward to the day when I come across an old picture or hear his name (which I can't even speak) and it have no effect.

Those will be days of peace.

Woke up this morning...

2007-01-29T16:20:00.000-06:00

Woke up this morning and I had no hives on my body! Yay! This is the 3rd night sleeping on the couch now. I was worried because I had several hives that popped up yesterday, but I spent a lot of the day cleaning out the office and back and forth from the office to the bedroom with the tempurpedic bed and there was so much dust gathered in the office!

Anyway, this morning I didn't even have to take an antihistamine and still without hives, so that's a nice change.

Started in on the second week of school. I'm kind of enjoying classes right now. The class sizes are considerable smaller than last semester. We have 12 in Orgo II and 16 in Physics II and it makes it more fun.

I'm going to do an honors experiment in Orgo II this semester, and probably will do one with the topic of creating ethanol from organic materials and yeast. Mini-brewmaking, if you will. I thought it would be fun, and I can explain the chemical and biologic processes to Joe as I go since he's taken to homebrewing.

Joe's at the gym, and I'm just vegging right now. I have work to do later, mostly sorting and filing papers and mail, and I'll do that while I watch some TV tonight.

Got a "save the date" card from my old college roommate, who is getting married in Jamaica at the Sandals resort in June. I'm still on the fence about going - not because I don't want to, but because we're also going to a wedding in Canada in July, and Joe is going to be a groomsman in that wedding, so it will be more expensive than if we were just attending. We'll see. I've never been to Jamaica and I haven't been diving for a few years now, so it might be worth it to go diving! Joe probably won't be able to go, so I'll need to find someone to go with if I go. We'll see as it gets closer.

/post

Meg and Joe Speak!

Closing Shop

I'm tired...

A new semester...

Quotes from Fern's Bible....

End of the Year Update...

Birthday week....

July 2009

The Second French Revolution

Busy Bee...

Gibbs-Slap!

The Media's Top 10 Worst Economic Myths of 2008

PC Campus: Academia’s Top 10 Abuses of 2008

PC Campus: Academia’s Top 10 Abuses of 2008

No, I'm not mean......

Saddam's WMDs FOUND!!!!!

7 untruths about Sarah Palin

20 general differences between conservatives and liberals...

November surprise!

First day of school...

All moved in!!!

Meg is off to School

New Author...

Happy Birthday!

Tick tock tick tock...

Hanging up the old speech therapy jacket...... for now

Tick tock...

Behind home plate....

July Info Packet...

In Memory Of.....

Leno Headlines...

RMED Orientation....

Presenting.... Noah!!!!!!

NOLA and the Gulf Coast....

Poor, poor Michael Moore....

Financial Aid....

First Info Packet!!!!

A Steel Magnolia....

Quick Update...

Internet time warp....

LOL

Watch This Space....

10 All Natural Ways to Stop Feeling Depressed...

Still in limbo....

Footloose...

Frozen Grand Central

RMED interview part II.......

RMED interview part I..........

New Filling...

Happy Birthday!

Happy New Year!!!!!!!

I just want to say....

Christmas 2007

AWPA list!!!!!

Four-Eyes and a trip to Rockford in January!

No More S/R.F. !!!!!!!

SIU falters at SLU

SIU interview invite part III....

"He bite me on my vagina!"

Dawgs win!!!!!!

Huckabee in '08!!!!

Classic Phil Hartman....

Some of the best of Mike Myers on SNL...

10 Funniest SNL Commercials

Unicorn Kingdom Club

SIU interview invite part III...

SIU interview invite part II...

New Year's Resolution Idea....

Primary Application Essay

Halloween in Tijuana (I mean Carbondale)....

**** Breaking News!!!****

Upcoming events....

Down on the world again...

Audit.....

Waitlisted and more interviews....

CCOM interview, KCOM hold

DMU interview

Hanging out....

2nd interview invite!

My first interview!!!!!!

Breaking News!!!